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So he was still talking about them moving forward.
She just wasn’t sure if that was a good thing or not.
Mainly because it didn’t seem fair to him.
Her life was a bit of a mess right now and between her grandfather’s health, her parents being back, and her career and dance future being up in the air…
For once, she wasn’t going to take the easy or selfish way out.
For once, she was going to do the hard thing and put someone else first.
“Listen, Noah,” she began hesitantly. “Um…things are just…chaotic right now. And with your new promotion, maybe it’s best if we sort of…cool things down for a bit. After all, I don’t want to be the reason anything bad happens. I plan on having a serious talk with my father, but with all the stuff going on with my grandfather, I just feel like…”
“Wait, are you breaking up with me?” he asked incredulously. “Seriously? I sat there today and openly admitted I was with you this morning so everyone knows about us. And in the grand scheme of things, I should have said something to your father three years ago instead of acting like a coward! We’re two adults, Lily! This was one fight and suddenly we’re through?”
This wasn’t anything she was prepared for because unlike all her previous relationships, this one meant something.
So why am I walking away?
But she knew. There were things she wanted to do that would only hurt Noah, and he didn’t deserve that, just like he didn’t deserve her hateful behavior earlier today.
She hated things to be complicated and messy and everything about them and the coming days and weeks promised to be just that, so…
“Trust me,” she said firmly, “I’m doing us both a favor. I…don’t regret this last month and if things were different, this could have been something amazing.”
“It’s already something amazing, Lily! I love you!” He paused and she heard his slight huff of frustration. “Can we please get together tomorrow and talk? Maybe after a good night’s sleep…?”
Her heart was breaking, but she had to stand firm. “It’s for the best,” she repeated and hated the tremble in her voice. “Take care of yourself, Noah. I know you’re going to do great things.” Tears were streaming down her face—tears she didn’t even realize were building—and as she hung up, she didn’t even bother to wipe them away.
And then she was crying so hard her entire body hurt. It was so much harder than she thought it would be, but she had to stay strong. Noah had his whole life planned out and the last thing he needed was for her to come along and ruin everything he’d worked so hard for.
But damn, did she wish things could be different.
She wished her whole freaking life could be different right now.
Flinging her arm over her eyes, she murmured, “I wishIwere different right now. Why can’t I get my shit together?” And that just made her cry even more.
At some point, she fell asleep. The next time she opened her eyes, the sun was up and her phone was ringing. Groaning, she reached for it and cursed because she didn’t put it on the charger after talking to Noah last night.
“H’lo?” she said sleepily.
“Oh my goodness, Lily! Are you seriously still in bed?” her mother asked with mild amusement.
“Um…yes?” Pushing her hair from her eyes, she slowly sat up. “What time is it?”
“Almost ten. We’re all up at the house with Grandma and thought you were joining us. We’re having a bit of a late breakfast. Why don’t you get dressed and come on up?”
“Uh…sure. Sure. Just give me a few minutes.”
“Okay, sweetie. We’ll see you soon.”
She groaned again, flopped back down against the pillows, trying to find the will to get up. Her phone was still in her hand, and when she looked down, she saw she had a few texts. Swiping the screen, her eyes went a little wide when she saw who they were from.
Drea: Hey, Lily! Hope you’re doing better! Tryouts are next week, and I was curious if you were coming back to Miami for them?
Drea: Tag was asking about you and said you really should come back!
Drea: I know you moved back to NC, but if you need a place to stay, you can crash with me. Let me know! Call me!
