AllFreeNovel
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‘I know, you’re right. Everything we do is for our kids, isn’t it?’
She studies me carefully. ‘I wish you’d talk to me more. I feel like you’re putting up a wall. Is it because you know I like Max? I don’t approve of what he’s done, but isn’t your marriage worth fighting for? Even if it’s just for Poppy’s sake?’ She lowers her voice to a whisper. ‘And what if he’s done something? I’m really worried about him, Han.’
I freeze. ‘What do you mean?’
‘I mean like…killed himself. What if he just can’t handle it? Suicide’s the biggest cause of death among young men in this country.’
A heavy lump lodges in my throat. I haven’t considered that Max might contemplate ending his life. And these last few dayshavefelt different. I haven’t seen the man in the silver Golf, and there have been no more threatening messages. Everything is still and quiet.The calm before the storm?
‘No,’ I say to Sarah. I can’t let myself believe that. I have to stay positive for Poppy. ‘Max will be okay.’
There’s a flicker of doubt on her face when she looks at me. ‘I’m sure you’re right. No point thinking the worst. Max will just be hiding out somewhere, waiting until he feels ready to come back and face everything.’ Her mouth twists. She doesn’t believe what she’s saying.
‘I’d better get going,’ she says, checking her phone. ‘See what A & E has in store for me today.’ She sighs. ‘Friday nights are the worst.’
‘I hope it goes well with Dean tomorrow,’ I say, as I see her out. ‘I’m here if you need me.’
Once Sarah’s left, and the girls are in bed, I go through the house checking the doors and windows are locked. I peer through the blinds, scanning the street outside. Everything is quiet. No silver Golf. A tight knot forms in my stomach.
I message Taylor to tell him I’m going to bed. This has become a regular habit with us: keeping in touch throughout the day, even when there’s no news to share. I need to know that he’s okay, and I assume he feels the same. He replies tonight within a few minutes.
Still don’t like the thought of you and Poppy being alone there. You know where I am.
In the kitchen, I make a cup of tea to take upstairs. The girls are both sleeping deeply when I check on them, and I make a silent promise to Poppy:I’ll be everything to you. Just like Sarah is to Ivy.
Closing the door behind me, I turn off the lights and climb into bed, using my phone to set the alarm downstairs.
Sleep comes more easily tonight, and after only a couple of minutes, my eyes become heavy, closing until there’s nothing but blackness.
A heavy thud wakes me.One of the girls falling out of bed?
I rush to Poppy’s room and fling open the door, shining my phone torch into the room. But they’re both there, lost to sleep. Safe.
With my heart thudding, I check the bathroom, then the spare room. Nothing is out of place. Nothing has fallen.
Downstairs is also undisturbed. But something’s not right. It takes me a moment to work out what it is, and when I do, panic seeps through my veins.
The alarm down here isn’t on.
I set it right before I fell asleep. I know I did. I pull out my phone, and click on the app. Disarmed.I didn’t press it properly, that must be it. It’s easily done.
But when I hear a noise – movement and breathing – I know that I’m wrong.
‘I said you’d never be free, Hannah.’
I turn around and face Max. He looks a mess. Dirty clothes. His hair unbrushed. And then I notice the knife he’s holding, glistening in the darkness. I try not to focus on it, and forcemyself to look at Max instead. There are so many things I want to say – need to say – but fear keeps me rooted to the spot.
‘I’m taking Poppy,’ he says. ‘She needs to be with me.’
Finally I find my voice. I’ll only get one chance at this. ‘Max, please. We can talk. About everything. There’ll be a way to sort this out.’ My voice cracks. ‘There’s always a way.’But how can there be when he’s killed someone?
He inches forward. ‘It’s too late for any of that.’
I want to back away but I don’t. I have to believe there’s still a tiny fragment of humanity left in him. ‘Please, Max. Poppy’s upstairs. And Ivy too. What if they came down now and saw you holding that?’
Max shakes his head. ‘Everyone will understand one day,’ he says. ‘They’ll see that I didn’t have a choice.’ He lifts the knife and I shrink back.
I glance around, but I can’t see any way out of this. I turn back to him. ‘There’s always a choice, Max. You just have to make the right one. Isn’t that what we always tell Poppy? To make good choices?’
