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I never expected this reaction.
A part of me always assumed he left us because my sister did something to him. That she hurt his pride, but eventually, he’d lick his wounds, come back, and apologize.
But that wasn’t the case at all.
Instead, I found out everything was a lie.
That’s the hardest part about sitting here. I’m grieving for him, but I’m also having a hard time reconciling all the truths that have come out since Erin’s phone call.
I’m out of place.
I know absolutely no one but my sister.
From where I sit in the back of the church, I watch the front row. People who I assume are his family sit side by side in the pew closest to Ronald’s coffin. They must be related to him since they always reserve the front row for family.
Not the back row.
The back row is reserved for people like us.
People who sneak in, hoping no one recognizes them for what they are…
Homewreckers.
There is no way to sugarcoat what we are.
The truth stabs me in my chest.
The lie my sister kept from me all these years is finally out in the open for me to fully understand.
Ronnie was never our Ronnie.
He was their dad.
Someone else’s husband.
I stare at the people I assume are his daughter and son.
A blond woman and a handsome man are sitting in the front row. Beside them, an older woman weeps into a handkerchief.
The person he promised to share a life with. That’s the part I have a hard time reconciling. Watching them hold each other is a dagger in my heart.
He said he loved us. He said he loved me and he’d take care of us.
It was all a lie.
That voice in my head hasn’t shut up all week.
Beside me, I hear my sister huff. The sound grates on my nerves. It’s like nails on a chalkboard.
She knew.
I might have been ignorant, but she always knew.
She’s staring at his family too, but instead of remorse over the part we’ve played in their lives, she’s shooting daggers at them.
“They can cry all they want. Wait until they find out the money is mine,” she mumbles to herself. I turn to face her, shocked by what she just said, and she shrugs. “What? I put up with that man for almost ten years of my life. It’s time to get my money.”
I wish her bitter words shocked me, but they don’t.
