Page 54 of White Noise


Font Size:  

I skulked off to my trailer with my dressing gown in my arms, then sat there like a fool, waiting for the redness on my face go down.

Picked up my phone and typed words into the text box.

I know I’m supposed to go see Mum, but I don’t want to. I feel all kinds of fucked up right now, and I know we should give each other space and all that…

I deleted it and stared at my phone. Grunted in frustration over my inability to know the right thing to do.

I need you.

I couldn’t tell you how much my face was burning having sent that. I was childish and needy, and then I laughed out loud.

Who is this?

God. How much of an idiot was I?

Matt, it’s me. I’m going crazy here. I just want to come back to yours and lie in your bed and kiss you. I know that’s stupid and I need to give you space and all that, and I have no idea what I’m doing still, but I just filmed a difficult scene, and I’m emotional and drained.

Talk about immature word vomiting. My hands shook as I pressed send. He replied straight away. I knew he would.

I’m sat on the sofa watching some cooking show, hugging your hoodie because you’re not here and I miss you.

There were the tears again, rolling down my face.

I can’t even function when I think of you.

It was true. I couldn’t. I couldn’t even act like I was normal. And then he replied, and I couldn’t stop smiling.

That’s why you’re my boyfriend.

X

Matt

Itwasnosurprisethat he crawled into my bed just after ten that night. I’d half expected it, to be honest. Not that Con had miraculously figured out how to use that phone of his after his surprise emotional outburst this morning, but he’d at least told me he was going to his mum’s for dinner. Then, suddenly, here he was, stripping off in the hallway, detouring into the bathroom where the shower went on and off, while I wondered if it was presumptuous to undress or if I should just stay here in my night gear, sleep socks and all.

He threw the wet towel over the bathroom door, letting his feet make sloppy patterns on the floor—something that should have made my teeth clench, but instead I smiled as he rolled naked into bed and made himself comfortable with his damp hair on my chest.

The front of my top was soaking, but I didn’t complain. Having him here had again put me in a coma of complete bliss.

“Hello, muffin,” I said softly.

“Hello yourself.” He smiled. I could feel his cheek muscles contracting against my skin.

“I missed you.”

“Yeah. I know the feeling. Mum says hi, she wants to meet you. Said you’re welcome to tag along for the weekend, whenever it suits you.”

“It’s a bit early, perhaps, for meeting the parents.”

“Parents…well, you won’t meet my sperm donor. But Mum is seriously cool. She’ll cook us dinner, ask if you want her to do your laundry, then mock you relentlessly and tell you to do it yourself. I’m kind of nifty with a washing machine. I sort the colours and read the labels and everything.”

“Good to know.” I giggled, stroking his hair. “So, you told her…about me?”

“Yeah.” His hand smoothed down my hip, digging under my waistband until he was cupping my arse.

“You like my arse?” I asked innocently.

“Iloveyour arse. And thanks for the bite mark. My make-up artist was scandalised.”

Source: www.allfreenovel.com