AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“Yeah, so your friend Otis has ordered me something full of chilli and stuff, so…”
“We can share.”
“Can you…help me order something I might be able to eat? I have no idea what anything on that menu is.”
“Muffin.” I turned around and cupped his chin, kissed the tip of his nose because away from all the madness out there was this incredibly gorgeous child of a man. All it took was one sentence and I was falling head over heels in love with him again.
“I was thinking, earlier,” he said, hooking his arms around my neck. “I’ve been so scared of this theatre gig, thinking I couldn’t do it.”
“Youcando it,” I said sternly, hoping I wasn’t saying the wrong thing.
“I think I can.” He smiled. “Because my life is about to totally change—again. I have so much to tell you, and I think that play will be the least of my worries. I was standing on that float today, and I was bloody terrified. Because I had to be…me. Just me. Nobody else. I couldn’t even pretend to be Cass Powell because it wasn’t his day. I didn’t have a clue who I was supposed to be. So, I…decided to be your boyfriend. That was the only thing that kept me sane.”
“I saw,” I whispered. I’d seen his arm, still covered in smudged ink. I could still make out the letters spelling out MATT. Con wasn’t subtle, and the fact that he was here with his graffitied arm and all his words and his thoughts and that I was the one who got to hear them?
“This is the hardest part I’ve ever played,” he said quietly. “Trying to be a real person. Figuring out who I am. Being able to interact with people in, like…real situations. And I can do it. I never thought I could, but I can. It’s hard, but it’s going to be fine. Lots of things are about to change, Matt.”
“I know,” I murmured, letting my lips finally meet his. I needed that connection with him. “All that matters is that I know that this is real. What you and I have is real. Everything else?”
“Is just…” He smiled. And he kissed me. And I kissed him back. “Everything else is just white noise in the background.”
It made sense, and in that moment, I could feel it too.
“I also really need to pee.” He smiled, and I let go of him. Slapped his shoulder. Pushed him away from me and manhandled him into a cubicle, laughing when he shut the door in my face.
He was too much. Too real. Too…mine.
“Matt?” he called from behind the door.
“Yeah?”
“When we’ve eaten?”
I knew what was coming.
“Yes, baby, we can.”
“Good.” I heard him giggling as he flushed the toilet. “Because I asked Dave to pick us up in an hour and take us home. I need a shower, and I need to lie in bed with you and just put myself back together again.”
“And have sex?” I smiled innocently.
He walked back out and held up his hands. Then he leaned in and kissed me, and my chest burst with all the feelings that I had no idea how to put words to.
Con - One year later.
Iturnedmyheadand buried my face in Matt’s shoulder because I still, a year later, couldn’t watch the scene that was currently being blasted out on the screen with Caroline’s voice shouting lines of pure hatred as my face twisted in pain.
We’d both been so over it, overeverything, filming those last scenes. And, of course, the test audience had hated the ambiguous ending with Cass’s and Stella’s bodies lying on a deserted mountain top, played by body doubles so our faces weren’t even clear. We’d wrapped and unwrapped and reshot, and yes, we’d still died a horrible death, and that look of betrayal on my face, well Cass Powell’s face, as he’d drawn his last raspy blood-soaked breath?
That scene was about to earn me another award. I kind of knew I had it in the bag since I’d been slipped a thank-you speech with pointers and all the names I needed to mention. I’d memorised it already, so the speech would be no problem.
I was still slightly bitter over the wayWhite Noisehad gone down, but I was also thrilled that Aisha was spilling all the gossip from the season-seven set, since I’d had stern words with her about applying for the set manager job and not accepting anything less. She’d nabbed that job, and my heart skipped a joyful beat every time our little group chat pinged with more news of drama, breakdowns and a new lead actor who was as straight as they came and had a clause in his contract of no full-frontal nudity and no explicit scenes with members of any gender.
Why they’d thought they could make aWhite Noiseseason without the sex was beyond everyone involved, not least Caroline and me, who seemed to know our fanbase better than the goddamn scriptwriters and producers.
It would be a shitshow. A lazy script, a haphazardly put together cast and a team on minimum pay who’d already caused production delays by working to scheme and union rules. I didn’t blame them. If I’d worked to the rules, we’d still be shooting season one, and looking back now, I should perhaps have fought more. Stood up for myself.
Not that it mattered. I was gripping Matt’s hand so tight that he probably had no blood left in his fingers, but I needed him here. Desperately.
