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Deep down inside, she knew.
I didn’t have a goddamn clue.
I worked until noon. Then I hit up a bar and then a hotel with a woman I met at the bar because I couldn’t take her back to my apartment out of fear that my brother would find her.
During the six weeks he lived with me, I found him with four different girls. Not one of them had blue eyes and blonde hair.
Delaney loved Pol, but Pol loved everyone.
He was young, and he wanted to experience life for the first time. He was finally out from under the watch of our grandfather, so he made friends with the girls who turned his head.
Seeing the pain that still consumes Delaney was enough for me. It was too damn much. She reminded me that my brother never got the chance to be happy. She told me that it killed her to hear me say that I was buying cupcakes for the woman I love because my brother will never love anyone again.
How the fuck do I deserve more than him?
I reach into the pocket of my pants and pull out the key to my apartment.
I walked out of here this morning in love and on top of the world.
Tonight, I’ll break my own heart into a million pieces.
***
I walk in to find Emma standing at the dining room table. She’s wearing a short blue sundress that’s bouncing around her thighs.
I drop my gaze because I can’t look at her if I’ll never touch her again.
“Hey,” I offer when she doesn’t say anything to me.
“Hi.”
I expected more because I want more. I want something to hold with me forever because I’m going to walk out of here tonight without my heart.
“The contract came.” Her tone is stiff. “I’ll be working in New York.”
I hate the sound of it. I could barely get the words out when I called Maureen and told her to get back to the office to make the switch.
She suggested I sit on the decision for a day or two. I insisted she make the change and get the contract to Emma as quickly as possible.
I finally look up to see her tear-stained face.
Fuck. Just fuck.
She wanted to move to San Francisco. She wanted me.
“I’ll go to Seattle with Drake and Jane once they come back, and then I’ll find a place to live here.” She twists her hands together in front of her. “Bella can help me with that. She’ll know of a good neighborhood where I can find something reasonable. I can have my furniture shipped to Manhattan, I think. I’ve never done that before, but it can’t be that complicated.”
She’s rambling because she’s falling apart inside.
I want to take her in my arms. I want to tell her I love her.
Apollo will never get the chance to love a woman the way I love Emma.
“You’re welcome to stay here for as long as you need. I’m leaving for California tonight.”
Her hand grabs for the back of a chair. “You’re what?”
I’m running away.
I keep those words in and fall back on a believable excuse. “I need to take care of things there.”
Her head drops. “I thought you were going to stay until Drake came back.”
“I can’t,” I lie. I fucking lie to the most beautiful and kindest woman I’ve ever met.
“I guess this is goodbye?” She turns to face me. “I know it’s what we agreed to.”
I take a step toward her. “I’ll never forget you, Emma.”
“You will.” She half-laughs as her eyes fill with tears again. “It’s okay.”
I stalk toward her, stopping just short of taking her in my arms. “Listen to me. I will never forget you, Freckles.”
That breaks her. Her hands dart up to cover her face. “I’ll never forget you, Rush.”
“Emma.” I reach out a hand, but stop it mid-air.
“Let’s leave it at that.” She swipes a hand over her cheek to chase away a tear. “I’m not good with big goodbyes.”
I can’t ask for anything, so I nod in agreement. “I’ll pack up my stuff and head out.”
“I’m going to my room to look this over.” She picks up the contract. “I’ll have my attorney get in touch with yours when I’m ready to sign it.”
As she breezes past me, a tear spills from my eye. I take a breath as I hold it together until I hear the guestroom door shut with a click.
Chapter 62
Emma
“Emma?” Bella places a cup of coffee in front of me. “I got you a large.”
I look up into her blue-gray eyes. “Thank you.”
She takes a seat in a chair next to me. We agreed to meet at Palla on Fifth. Bella arrived first. She was drinking an herbal tea when I walked in.
She put it on the counter and ran to me. Gathering me in her arms, she gave me the hug that I’ve desperately needed for the past seven days.
