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“I get what you’re saying, and when the time comes, you might all be right. I might not be able to do it. But I failed her. We all failed her, and now she’s been violated in the worst possible way I can imagine. She’s having panic attacks, fuck so am Iwhenever the thought of having to testify comes up. If I can do something to spare her, I’ve gotta try. I have to,” I said.
Gran Dad looked at Adam and Brock, then back at me. “Okay,” he said.
Until Adam warned me about asking questions, we’d not spoken of that conversation again or the previous one where I’d asked for a favor. Gran Dad told me Adam and Brock were being assigned to protect Katie and me but that it wouldn’t always be in a bodyguard capacity. That was all I’d gotten then and not much else since.
I expected to be kept in the loop, to know what was happening. Being kept in the shadows while they operated in the dark without updating me was fucking ridiculous, and I was over it.
I swiped my thumb up the screen on my phone, pulling up my grandfather’s contact info. My thumb hovered over the call button, but I was interrupted by a beer being shoved in my line of sight.
“You know, you’ve been here for days, and at first, I thought, he’s fine, Morgan, he’s just missing Katie. But that’s not the case, is it?”
I looked at him as I twisted the cap off the beer he’d handed me. Unable to bring myself to say anything for fear I’d lose my shit, I lifted the bottle to my mouth, draining it. The only sound was theglug glugof the beer as it left the bottle.
Standing at the fence, toying with the empty beer bottle as I looked out over Charlotte’s grandparents’ farm, the weight ofeverything that had happened the last few months settled over me. It sucked the life from me, forcing the tears I’d been holding back—mostly—since I saw the test results Katie still hadn’t shared with me.
I dropped my head between my arms, where they rested on the top fence rail. I tried so damn hard to reign in the onslaught, but it was mission: impossible. It just wasn’t happening. I’d shoved that shit into a box for far too long.
My knees trembled with the effort it took to keep me upright. Fuck, my whole body was shaking from trying to keep most of the meltdown inside me so Morgan didn’t see me crying like a newborn who wanted its mama.
Just as my legs gave way, I felt Morgan’s arms grab hold of me, guiding me to the ground. I turned and slumped against the lowest fence rail, dashing the tears and snot from my face. Morgan never said a word while I tried to pull my shit together. He sat there with me, waiting. His presence was a balm to my withered soul.
Finally, I could form a response to the question he’d asked. “Yes, I’m missing Katie, but you’re right. That’s not all it is.”
“Do you wanna talk about it?” Morgan asked, his voice filled with caution.
“I never thought I’d find my person. I seriously thought I’d spend my life alone. Or as alone as a person with a family the size of mine and a revolving bedroom door can be,” I said, unable to even glance in his direction. I plucked blades of grass from the ground next to my legs instead.
“But you found her, and y’all are perfect together,” Morgan reminded me.
I nodded because he was right. Katie was perfect for me, but I didn’t think I was perfect for her anymore.
Sixteen
Katie
It had been four days since Jackson left for Pennsylvania. We’d barely spoken in the time he’d been gone. It felt like a piece of me was missing. I tried to sleep, but sleep wouldn’t come without him beside me. But the biggest issue was the thoughts that plagued me day and night.
Thoughts I’d still not shared with Jackson.
“I think I’m pregnant. And I don’t know whose it is.”
Those were the words I’d spoken a week ago when I lied to Jackson about going to PT, and instead, I’d gone to see Liam. Words that had changed my life yet again. Having the rug jerked from under you every few weeks was so much fun.
Meeting Jackson was a huge rug, but this one? This one could prove catastrophic. Meeting Jackson had changed everything for the better. It had given me something I never thought I’d have because I was broken, and sexuality wasn’t ever going to be in the cards for me.
Then Jackson Holt strutted into my soundcheck and turned my life upside down. He filled my soul with such beautiful music, and I didn’t want to lose that, but I was afraid that I wouldn’t get a choice in the matter.
“I think I’m pregnant. And I don’t know whose it is.”
Liam didn’t say a single word until I turned and looked at him. Tears started to run down my face like twin rivers during a flood, drenching my face, neck, and shirt when I noticed the shocked, pity-filled look on his face.
The pity in his eyes and his face zapped the last of my strength, and I stumbled toward a chair. Liam lurched forward to grab me, pulling me into his arms as I fell completely apart. He murmured nonsensical words against my temple as he patted my back.
When I finally calmed down, I felt parched. My eyes and face burned from the saltiness of my tears. My muscles ached, and my hip hurt from standing for so long.
I stepped away from Liam, embarrassed that he saw me in such a state. I apologized to him for dousing him in emotions.
“You are justified, and I am happy I was able to be there for you. Why don’t we sit and talk about what’s going on?”
