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“You need to stay in bed to rest yourself.” the doctor snaps.
“I'm sorry,” Ray grits her teeth, “I don’t remember asking for fucking permission. I need to see my fucking husband right now.”
The doctor lets out a frustrated sigh. “I’ll get a nurse to take you. You must go in the wheelchair, though. You're on bed rest, and if you want those babies to be okay, you need to take it easy.”
She just nods.
“I’ll send someone shortly.”
Ray
The nurse takes me through to see Steel. He’s so pale. He’s lost so much fucking blood. “Stay in the chair,” she insists as she wheels me as close to the side of the bed as she can get. Before putting on the brake and leaving.
I take his hand in mine and kiss the back of it. “Hey, beautiful.” I sigh. His hand feels cold in mine. I close my eyes, rest my head on his hand, and contemplate what life will look like now. What if he doesn't make it? What if I’m left alone with the babies? I don’t even know how to look after a baby, let alone fucking two. This is gonna be a shitshow of epic proportions.
I remember hearing somewhere that if you talk to coma patients, they can hear you. “Steel, baby, I love you. Please come back to me safe, please make it back. If you can hear me, don’t give up, okay? I need you. Our babies need you. I’m so sorry I left you at the cabin. If I had known then what I know now, I would never have left. I would never have let you believe I was dead. I did it for you all. I didn't realise… the cabin… that's where we would conceive our children. The doctor says that when I was tortured by Roach, and he burnt me with the screwdriver under my arm, he actually damaged my implant, so technically, it's Roach’s fault. I know you said you wanted kids, but I hope to Hades you still do after everything we've been through. I just want to be a family. Do you think I deserve to be happy? I hope I deserve to be happy. I don’t want to not be with you. I love you. I need you to come back to me, Steel. Baby, please, don’t leave me.” I rest my head on his arm and sob. Everything just gets the best of me, and I can't help but let it spill out. I don’t know how long I’m there, but I must have cried myself to sleep as I feel a gentle nudge on my shoulder. I jolt upright, but it's just the nurse.
“Come on, we need to get you back to bed.”
I nod and kiss the back of his hand. “Goodnight, my heart, my love. See you soon. Don't leave me, okay!'' I kiss his hand again before I’m wheeled back to my room. We can barely get the wheelchair in as there are too many chairs dotted around. They said only two to a bed, but when you own the place, I suppose no one wants to be the one to say you can't do anything.
“Ray.” Ma smiles as her eyes flutter awake. “You okay, child?”
I nod. “I’m fine, tired.” She nods as she helps me into bed while the nurse takes the chair away.
“Do you need me to do anything for you?”
I shake my head but grip her hand, looking at the guys sleeping around us. “Will you stay with me, Ma?” I grip her hand tighter and lean in. “I'm so scared.” I close my eyes, sigh, and feel the bed shift as she climbs up next to me.
She wraps her arms around me, and I snuggle into her chest like I used to when I was little and first lost my mum. She used to hold me till I fell asleep, so none of the boys knew, and I was so grateful. I didn't want them to see me as weak.
As my breaths even, I relax against her. She whispers into my ear, “I've got you, my child. I always will. Sleep, and take care of yourself and my grandbabies.”
I take a deep breath and hold onto hope as it's the only thing I have left right now. Hope that the twins will be okay, hope that Steel will be okay, and hope for a future which is more than I had a few days ago.
It's been just over two weeks since my world was flipped on its head. I still feel like I can't breathe, eat, or sleep. I’m still on bed rest, and it’s driving me insane. I’m done. I sling the covers back, take a shower and pack up my things. I’m still in the hospital, but that’s only because we own the fucking thing.
I head past the nurses’ station, and Sharon pushes up from the chair. I glare her way, “Not to-fucking-day, Sharon!” She nods and sits back down.
I push into his room, pull the chair to his side, and take his hand. “You need to hurry the fuck up and get well. I’m not done here. We’re not done yet. Do you hear me? Listen and listen fucking good. I’m here. We’re. Not. Fucking. Done!”
I keep pulling and twisting at his fingers, pinching the back of his hand, anything to get him to wake up. The doctors come in for morning rounds, clearly not expecting me to be sitting there. Flicking me a stern glare of disappointment. “Mrs. Ste—”
I cut him off with a glare of my own, to which he apologises.
“I’m sorry, Black Queen, you really should…”
He trails off as I fix him with another glare. “How long? Before he wakes up? I want to take him home.”
“We’re monitoring him, and he's slowly starting to respond. He should wake up any day now. We won't know until he wakes up what the situation will be.”
“Throw everything you have at it, Doc. I want him fit, well and home as soon as possible.” I stand and turn to face him. “That isn’t a request. That's an order.”
The doctor nods and scurries out of the room. I know I'm being unreasonable, but I'm done waiting. I'm itching, and I know what I have to do. I just need to focus. Get. Him. Home.
The rest of the day is uneventful. I know they will come for me tomorrow, I haven’t forgotten what day it is, but I hate him, and I refuse to go to his fucking funeral. So I pull my phone out…
“VERIFICATION.”
