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She’d told me that in continuing to deny who I was, I would eventually put myself in harm’s way. I’d asked her how she planned on following her own advice and she’d told me that she’d learned very quickly that my father’s instincts on security were spot on. She was a rule breaker like me, yet she’d managed to not only learn to obey my father’s rules, she even seemed to value his strength and knowledge.
Why hadn’t I been able to do the same?
I took two long steps toward the counter, slamming my hands on the surface, glaring at myself in the mirror. The truth was I didn’t like what I was seeing, the foolishness and childish behavior more like temper tantrums than anything else. I wasn’t asserting my authority because I had none. I wasn’t highlighting my independence; I was making a fool of myself over and over again.
Especially with the man who’d remained centered in the forefront of my mind.
I was an idiot through and through.
“Damn you.” I pointed my index finger at the girl then shook my head. The bullshit was going to stop right now. I wanted to work with Maddox to try to help. I needed to be a part of the solution so I could return home. I didn’t want my father to die. I just…
A single tear slipped past my lashes and I watched as it slowly trickled down my cheek. Before it reached my chin, I furiously wiped it away, feeling more secure in who I was than just seconds before. It was time to act like a goddamn adult. As thoughts about Maddox drifted into the back of my mind, I tried to determine if what I was feeling was nothing more than a childish fantasy, something that I’d shove aside like he did with Lola.
Memories flowed, so many of them that I was able to laugh at more than one. When they shifted to the moment on the beach with him, the incredible picnic and the campfire, I realized I hadn’t been lying or fooling myself. I loved him. He deserved to know that I wouldn’t toss him aside.
That I wouldn’t leave.
He’d risked everything, including his friendship to keep me safe. Now it was time I offered everything I had to the man I adored.
A naughty thought replaced the haunted ones, and I thought about what I’d brought with me in clothes. I’d tossed a couple of things into my suitcase on a whim, hopeful that Maddox would finally see me for the vixen I was. Yeah, right. Laughing, I threwthatgirl another look before almost skipping into the bedroom, locating the sexy nightie I’d brought with me. If the sexy crimson piece didn’t help him understand exactly how I felt, then nothing would.
I hurriedly slipped into it, running my fingers through my curls then fluffing my hair when I was finished before opening the door. After taking a deep breath, I moved into the hallway, listening for any signs of where he might be. Hearing nothing, I eased up the stairs, heading toward the living room where we’d been standing.
He wasn’t there.
He wasn’t outside either.
The silence in the house was terrifying but he’d closed the back door. As I moved throughout the house, I noticed he’d set the alarm near the entrance, the beeping light an indication of his actions. He’d explained the security system after our arrival, cautioning me of where cameras were located throughout the house and the exterior.
The man was a consummate bodyguard. No, he was more than that. He was brilliant and organized, the only man worthy to be my father’s right-hand man. I inched down the corridor to his office, noticing the light. He was forever working, trying desperately to solve the riddle.
When I moved to the doorway, I could tell how tense he was by his shoulders, his body rigid as he sat in front of a series of computer screens. He wasn’t blinking and in truth, I couldn’t tell if he was breathing. In my bare feet, I padded inside, surprised that he didn’t notice my approach. I eased behind his chair, noticing he had a list of people and cities up on the screen.
There were weapons in an open duffle, the man ready for a war. This might be the first time I’d allowed myself to be impressed more so than incensed. He was very good at what he did.
I held my breath and placed my hands on his shoulders.
The exaggerated breath he let out was ragged, the sound as haunting as his face had become. When I squeezed his shoulders, kneading them in a gentle massage, he tensed for a few seconds.
“You should get some sleep,” he said in a husky voice, even more so than before. I noticed a glass of liquor and a bottle of scotch on the desk beside him, as if he planned on drinking the night away.
“I’m not tired.” I continued to massage him, shifting one hand to his neck, using my long fingers to try to knead out the kinks.
“You need your rest.”
“No.”
“Hmmm…” He didn’t move yet his fingers remained poised on the keyboard, his chest rising and falling.
“You’re tense.”
“I have reason to be.”
“Let me make it better.” I slipped one hand down his chest, still caressing. He was as hot as I was, the rush of heat between us easily combustible.
He half chuckled and took a sip of his drink. “I don’t think you can.”
“You’re doubting my skills?”
