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“I’m so glad.”
We sit in silence, watching him. It’s surreal to have them here. I don’t know how to handle the situation. I’m at a loss.
“I don’t know what to say,” my mom confesses. “I’m sure you have a lot of questions but I don’t think now is the time.” She glances at Elijah.
“Grant said some things,” I start. I rub my eyes. “Maybe, now is the perfect time to get answers. Once Elijah is awake, we will have things to discuss and I want to dedicate time to him.”
“I understand.” She rubs her hands together and leans forward, her elbows on her knees. “I don’t know what he told you but I am going to tell you the truth. When I’m done, I’ll answer any questions you have.”
“Okay,” I agree.
“Your father was best friends with the Alpha, who was Grant’s dad. They were so close. I met them in town at a bar, of all places. I had been traveling, so I was new in town. It was instantaneous, the bond, as you know. I knew with everything in me that your dad was my mate. He was so handsome and tall. He made me feel…” she closes her eyes, “Needed and the only woman in the world. I felt special. He wanted me to move in right away—I was hesitant. One of the problems I saw was that Roger, Grant’s dad, was always there when we saw each other. He always had to be involved, going on dates with us, out to eat, to the movies. It was too much. I didn’t know how to approach it with your dad. At first, I don’t think he saw anything wrong with it.
“He loved Roger like a brother, and he didn’t want him to be left out. I wanted time with my mate without any distractions. We had to sneak around, which could be fun but turned annoying when we couldn’t pull it off. Roger would find us. Finally, after you were born— which was a miracle, considering we hardly ever got to be alone—I talked to your dad about it. He admitted that he noticed and he didn’t know how to approach it with him.
“He finally did and it didn’t go well. Roger was very upset and confessed his love for me. That didn’t go over well with your dad, but his shock didn’t last long. Roger was good with talking people into things, especially his best friend.” She bows her head, hiding her eyes from me. “He was very convincing. He wanted to be with me, but I refused. He then asked if he could be in the room while I was with my mate.” She turns shameful eyes to mine. “I agreed. I didn’t mind being watched,” she whispers.
“You don’t have to defend your preferences,” I tell her. As much as I don’t want to think about my parents in that way, she doesn’t need to be embarrassed.
“It was supposed to be one night. We planned it with very strict rules. Roger wanted to join. I said no—I couldn’t stand anyone else’s touch.”
“Grant told me that you were with Roger that night.”
She shakes her head violently. “I wouldn’t let him. He tried. We let him watch and that’s it. Neither of us wanted him to be involved past watching.” She closes her eyes and drops her head back to the wall. “It was over. The deal was that one night. For me, it was in the past. It was something I never wanted to do again. He made it weird and uncomfortable.”
“That wasn’t the end though,” I say softly.
“No,” she says. “He wouldn’t leave me alone. Every time I turned around he was there, watching me. It made my skin crawl. We lived next to each other, close to the whole pack.”
May makes a pained noise and I look at her. Her face is buried in her knees. I remember that we are talking about her dad. I can’t imagine what she is thinking.
“What did Dad do?”
“He was…” she whimpers. “Distraught. He was stuck in the middle of a situation that he didn’t know how to get out of. We made plans to leave. It wasn’t easy with a baby, but we decided on when. We had to figure out where we were going. We didn’t tell anyone. There were many people in the pack that were scared of Roger, scared of what he would do to them. He had become unpredictable. Some of his actions became questionable, but no one had the power he had. No one wanted to fight him, and that is what had to happen in order for an Alpha to become unseated.”
“What about Dad?” I know nothing about him. I don’t even remember what he looked like.
She looks at me sadly. “As much as I loved him, he wasn’t an Alpha. He didn’t have the guts to take him on. Your dad wasn’t a man that stood up and took actions.”
“Grant told me that he walked in on Roger violating a woman, tried to stop him, and that’s why Dad was killed.”
“It’s true.” She crosses her arms and stares at the wall. “It was me. I was in the room with the Alpha. It wasn’t the first time he did it. I kept it from your father.” She quiets when May whimpers.
“Why?” I ask weakly, my heart aching for her.
“I wanted to protect my mate. I wanted to deny it, maybe.” She covers her face. “Your dad was in denial also. I had already gotten pregnant with May. When I had her, he saw her black hair, so different than our brown. We didn’t have anyone in our families with black hair. I knew she was the Alpha’s. On some level, he did, too. I had nightmares. At that point, I couldn’t stand the touch of anyone.
“After so many times, I would revert to a place in my head. I would become desensitized. I would pray for it to end.” Her face is filled with horror.
“How was it possible for you to get pregnant outside the mate bond?” My skin is chilled as our hushed words fill the room. My mom’s painful past turns my stomach and I don’t want to know more. “You don’t have to say anymore.” I hate that May has to hear it.
“I have to get it out. I have realized, the longer I hide what happened, the worse I feel.” She sits up straight. “You shouldn’t be able to,” she answers my question. “My guess is that May is supposed to be here. There are no mistakes,” she says roughly to May.
This must be a conversation they have had often. They lock eyes until May lowers hers.
“Why didn’t we have May with us when we ran?” I hate that there is accusation in my voice.
“I trusted the wrong person. She betrayed me,” she sneers.
