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I’m sure she thinks she’s being helpful, so I smile back at her and then lead Townes over to a deserted corner of the store.
“What’s up?” I ask, trying to sound nonchalant.
“What’s up? You tell me?” He growls. “Why are you ignoring me? You haven’t answered any of my texts or calls. I came by your place yesterday, and I know you were home.”
“I must have been sleeping,” I lie, and he narrows his eyes at me.
“You’re lying.”
I swallow hard, crossing my arms over my chest and looking away from him.
“What happened, Mira? I thought things were good between us, and then you started to ice me out. What did I do?”
His words break my heart, and I clear my throat, trying to remove the lump forming there.
“Nothing. You didn’t do anything. It’s me. Things are just moving really fast between us, and I’m not sure I’m ready for that.”
“Fine, then say that. We can slow down.”
“Can we? Ever since we started dating, you’ve seemed to have one speed. I mean, we’ve only been together for like a week and a half, and we spend all of our free time together.”
“I like spending time with you,” he says, sounding confused and hurt.
“I do, too, I just… I don’t even know,” I admit.
Tears burn the backs of my eyes and I try to blink them back.
“I’m scared, Townes,” I whisper, and he tries to pull me into his arms, but I push him away.
“You’ve experienced so much. You’ve seen the world. I’ve seen a few towns in the surrounding two hundred miles.”
“So, we’ll travel more.”
“It’s not just that. It’s me,” I stress, the first tears falling onto my cheeks.
“Mira…”
“I don’t think you realize how isolated and alone I was growing up. It was just my mom and me. No friends, no boyfriends, nothing. Then I came here and I made friends. I have two jobs that I love, my own apartment, and my own space. I’m in charge of my life and I love that freedom. I’m trying to figure out what I like and it was going well.”
I stop, but I can see that he knows where I’m going.
“Until you met me,” he says quietly, and I choke back a sob.
“Not just that. I like you. A lot. I just feel like I’m losing myself. I’m so scared to go back to where it’s just me and one person. I want to have friends and a life, and I think I would give that all away for you already.”
“I would never ask you to do that,” he insists, and I swipe at the tears.
“Maybe not on purpose, but you have a habit of taking over or bulldozing me.”
“How?”
“Insisting on me not helping you cook, demanding that you open my door for me,” I list off.
“I was just trying to be a gentleman,” he says, and I nod.
“I know, but it triggers me. It reminds me of my mom bossing me around. I don’t mind you doing that stuff sometimes, but I want to be independent. It’s important to me.”
“Okay, I can back off.”
