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When he finally does, Dean sits down on the bed, facing me. “You scared the shit out of me. Thank God you’re okay. When I got the call that you were here, I….” He shakes his head. “I’ve never been that fucking scared.”
“Sorry,” I mutter.
“You don’t need to be sorry. The fucker who did this to you is the one who should be sorry. And he will be when I find him.”
“It was Troy. I went to see him at his uncle’s garage.”
“Why were you there? You told me you were going to the football game.”
“I was going to, but I went to see Tara instead. I went to the diner where she works.”
“And Troy found out? Is that why—”
“No. He didn’t know I was there.” I pause a moment to rest. It takes a lot of effort to speak when I’m this tired. “I needed to see her. I had this dream that something happened to her. That she wasn’t safe. I needed to see that she was okay.”
“Did you talk to her?”
“Yeah. She said Troy found out she’d been with another guy, but he didn’t know it was me. He got angry and hit her.”
Dean lets out a sigh, almost like he knew Troy was abusing her. Or maybe he’s frustrated that I got myself in the middle of a situation that’s so similar to the one we grew up in. But I didn’t mean for that to happen. I didn’t want to believe Troy was someone who would do that.
“How do you know Troy hit her?” Dean asks.
“I saw the bruises. All over her back.”
“And she said Troy did that to her?”
“She said he lost his temper when he saw texts from another guy on her phone.”
“She was making excuses for him. Just like Mom did with Dad.”
“I think that’s why I lost it. I mean, I was angry that he did that to her, but it was more than that. I felt like I couldn’t control the anger. I finally know what you meant when you used to tell me that you couldn’t control it. I saw Tara covered in bruises and felt like I was watching Mom all over again.”
“And that’s when you went to find Troy.”
“Yeah, I called Sean to find out where he was.”
“He told me.”
“You talked to Sean?” I ask.
“He called me this morning to ask how you’re doing. He’s the one who found you at the garage and called for help. If he hadn’t gotten there when he did…well, I don’t want to talk about that.”
“Why did he go there? I didn’t tell him to.”
“He said he got worried when you called and were asking about Troy. He could tell something was up from the way you sounded.”
“How did I sound?”
“Like you were going to kill Troy.”
“I wanted to, especially when he admitted he hurt Tara. He sounded just like Dad. He was saying how Tara deserved it. How she made him do it. I punched him as hard as I could. Then I didit again and he fell down. That’s when he pulled out his knife.” I look at Dean. “I should’ve killed him. But I couldn’t do it.”
“Because that’s not who you are, Jake. You’re not Dad.”
“But I’m his kid. I have his genes. So why couldn’t I do it?”
“Because you know it’s not right. That’s a good thing, Jake. You should be happy about that.”
