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“Yeah, it does. It matters to me. And it would matter to a guy who wants to be with a girl because of who she is, not how many years she went to school or what she does for a job. Those guys are out there, Tara. I know, because I’m one of them.”
“What are you saying?”
I want to tell her, but I shouldn’t. I’ve said enough. I probably should’ve kept my mouth shut, but I couldn’t stand hearing her say those things about herself. I couldn’t have her thinking she doesn’t deserve something better than Troy.
“Jake,” she whispers, her eyes on mine. “Say something.”
But instead, I do the absolute last thing I should.
I kiss her.
13
JAKE
The kiss is betterthan any I’ve had before, even with Haley. Before her, I’d kissed other girls, but none of them came close to what I’m feeling now. This is intense. It’s like there’s this energy between us, this electricity, that I’ve never felt from a kiss.
I pull Tara toward me and she moves over and sits on my lap. My arms go around her and I feel her ass pressing down over my cock. Shit, that feels good. Everything about her feels good. Her lips are so damn soft and I love the feel of her in my arms, her legs wrapped around me. I go to take her scarf off and feel her pull away.
“Sorry,” I say, looking at her. “I shouldn’t have done that. I shouldn’t have kissed you.”
She’s breathing hard and her face is flushed. “I kind of wanted you to.”
“You did?”
“I wanted to know what it’d be like.”
“And? How was it?”
“Amazing.” Her eyes shut and she leans down, pressing her lips to mine. It fires off feelings inside me I didn’t know existed. I’m not even sure how to describe it, but it’s so damn good Inever want it to stop. Maybe this is what Dean feels like with Brook. It would explain why they can’t get enough of each other.
If we keep this up, we’re going to end up in her room or doing it right here on the couch. I’d love to be with Tara, but I don’t want to be that guy. The guy that goes from a first kiss to having sex. That’s Troy, and every guy like him. Guys who only want a girl for sex. That’s what Tara’s used to and all she thinks she deserves. I’m going to prove her wrong.
“Hey.” I gently push her back. “We should stop.”
She frowns. “You don’t like it?”
“I fucking love it. That’s the problem. If we keep doing this, we’re going to end up doing more. And I don’t want you thinking that’s why I kissed you. Or why I came over here.”
“Then why did you do it? Why did you kiss me?”
“Because I wanted you to feel what it’s like to kiss a guy who actually cares about you.”
She smiles. “Jake, you barely know me. We were kids when you knew me before. I’ve changed a lot since then.”
“Then I want to get to know who you are now. Even if we never do more than what we just did, I still want to get to know you.”
“Why?” she asks, like she’s truly confused why I would want that.
“Because I like you. A lot.” I run my hand down the side of her face. “And I don’t think you’ve changed as much as you think. You’re still the girl who puts others before herself, even when you shouldn’t.”
My gaze lowers to her scarf, which loosened when we were kissing, exposing part of her neck. There’s a huge bruise on the side of it.
“What the hell happened?” I ask.
“Nothing.” She hurries to tighten the scarf around her neck. “It was an accident.”
“An accident that bruised your neck?”
