AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“I’m serious. You never call me. Is everything okay?”
“Not really.”
“What’s going on?” he asks, already sounding worried. I don’t like worrying him. He’s got enough to worry about. He doesn’t need me adding on more.
“Tara and I broke up,” I say, like it’s not a big deal, even though I can’t stop thinking about it and haven’t slept in days.
It’s Thursday. It’s been almost a week since I saw Tara at her apartment with Troy, and a few days since she told me to get lost.
“When did this happen?” Dean asks.
“About a week ago. She got back with Troy. Well, I guess they were never really broken up, but it seemed like they were since Troy wasn’t around for most of September.”
“Are you still talking to her?”
“No, she doesn’t want anything to do with me.”
“I need to catch up here. Were you and her getting serious? Because last time we talked, you acted like you were keeping things casual.”
“Yeah, I might’ve lied about that. I knew you didn’t want me being with her so I didn’t want to tell you how close we were getting.”
“How close are we talking about?”
“I was seeing her almost every day. Sometimes spending the night there.”
“So she was basically a girlfriend.”
“She was more than that. I…I loved her.”
He sighs. “Sorry, Jake. That’s tough. You know, you don’t need to keep this stuff from me. You’re an adult now. You’re going to do stuff I don’t agree with, but that doesn’t mean you have to hide it from me. And as for Tara, the only reason I didn’t want you seeing her was because she was still dating Troy. She had plenty of time to break up with him and didn’t. That told me she never planned to. I guess I can’t say I’m surprised that this happened.”
“Sean said the same thing. I guess I was the only one who thought Tara and I had a chance.”
“What reason did she give you for why she didn’t want to see you anymore?”
“She thinks we’re too different. She said I’m not one of them anymore. She thinks I’ve changed because I’m going to college.”
“Youhavechanged.”
“Not enough that we couldn’t have made it work. I don’t care that she didn’t finish high school or that she’s a waitress. That stuff doesn’t matter to me.”
“Yeah, but it matters to her. If she doesn’t feel like she’s good enough for you, then it was probably uncomfortable for her to be around you. Maybe she felt like you were judging her.”
“But I wasn’t. I never said anything that would even make her think that.” I pause and try to think if maybe I did, but I can’t come up with anything. “How did you get over feeling that way with Brook?”
“What do you mean?”
“When you guys met and Brook was the rich girl from the fancy prep school. You felt like you weren’t good enough for her.”
“It wasn’t about being good enough. It was about being wrong for her. Back then, I wasn’t the right guy foranygirl, which is why I wouldn’t get serious with anyone. I told Brook to leave me alone because I was worried about hurting her. Physically.”
“You never would’ve done that.”
“You don’t know how bad I was back then. I didn’t tell you because I didn’t want to scare you.”
“You really think you would’ve hit Brook?”
“Probably not, but I wasn’t willing to risk it. I needed to get control of my anger before I’d let myself be with her. When I told her to go away, I was trying to protect her. I didn’t want her to go away, but I didn’t have a choice. I didn’t trust that she’d be safe with me.”
