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The butler and I both turned to find Elsie clipping down the hall, clad in her usual attire of a wool skirt and knit cardigan, even in the balmy August evening.
“For heaven’s sake, Bledsoe, that’s Lady Sofia’s mother, Miss Francesca,” she scolded him. “Let her through!”
“Gotcha, Jeeves,” I cut at him as I ducked under his braced arm. “I do belong here, after all.”
The butler sniffed and closed the door behind me with a harder click than was strictly necessary.
“My, my, aren’t we in a state?” Elsie took my arm and guided me down the hall. “Aren’t you home a bit early? I wasn’t expecting you until later.” She glanced over my shoulder, as if the front door might open again. “And where is the boy?”
“The boy?” I repeated. “The boy is too busy kissing every arse in England and dancing with Great Britain Barbie to bother with the mother of his child. If Sofia’s even his, that is. Who knows these days, am I right?”
My words slurred together, but even beneath my drunken haze, I was embarrassed. Embarrassed by my own behavior, but also for being that stupid girlfriend, the needy one who requires her boyfriend’s attention all the stupid time.
I wasn’t this girl. I was a mother. A good sister, half-decent teacher, all-around respectable gal. I was a reasonably self-sufficient human being who had never once needed a man to make her feel worthwhile.
And yet here I was, bitching and moaning because my boyfriend didn’t dance with me at the party.
What a wreck.
“Oh, darling, of course she’s his. Everyone knows it. After all, she’s the spitting image, isn’t she?”
God, I was tired of hearing that.
“I dunno,” I slurred as I was guided into a sitting room with a large fire crackling between several enormous built-in bookshelves, all filled with what was probably another priceless library. “Haven’t you heard, Els? I’m a liar, prob’ly just out for his money. Pullin’ it over him with a secret baby. The papers all say so.” I snorted loudly. “Maybe we should just get a DNA test and be done with it, amiright?”
Elsie settled me into one of the chairs near the fire, then waved a hand at the butler, who was lurking in the doorway like a disapproving bat. “Tea, Bledsoe.”
“But, ma’am, I shouldn’t think it right to leave you alone with…her.”
“At once,” Elsie snapped.
Bledsoe nodded and left.
“So long, Jeeves,” I called as I collapsed into one of the overstuffed chairs. “Elsie, where’s Sofia? I want to say good night.”
“Oh, Little Miss has been asleep for hours. Went out like a light, if I do say so. You’ll see her in the morning.” Elsie took her own seat across from me. “Now, why don’t you tell me what happened that sent you home alone without your escort, eh? I know I taught him better than that.”
But I just shook my head. “He had more important things to attend to than a sad American in a cheap dress.” I pulled at the material. “I bought it for him, you know. Spent a whole two hundred dollars. That’s a lot for me.”
I was sulking. Hard. I knew I shouldn’t be so upset. These were small things, and Xavier was under so much stress. Was it so bad to expect me to experience the party on my own?
No, Lea’s voice echoed within me. Or maybe it was Kate’s. Or Marie or Joni’s. Honestly, they were all blending together tonight.
He asked you to come. Said he needed you there. And then he freaking abandoned you with those snobs.
I sniffed. Somehow, thinking like that didn’t make me feel outraged anymore. It just made me feel sad and lonely.
“Oh, sweet girl,” Elsie said calmly. “I’m certain Xavier cares more for you and Sofia than he does about anyone—or anything—else in the world.”
I shrugged like a sullen teenager. “Sure. That’s why he went off and danced with Imogene, right?”
Elsie shook her head, almost like she couldn’t believe it. “Just you wait, boy,” she muttered under her breath.
“I can’t really blame him, Elsie. He saw me talking to this man from back home. A man he really doesn’t like. I got mad at him for being rude, and so we barely spoke all night. I get it. He wasn’t there for me. He was there for his family. I had no right to ruin it all.”
Elsie watched me for a long time. Her brow furrowed a bit until she seemed to come to a decision.
“You can’t see this, my girl, but he’s changed since you and Miss Sofia came into his life,” she said. “Something in him died when his dear mother—bless her soul, you know that Masumi was one of my very best friends. I tried to help her son, but he was very hard, you know, for a long time. But when he found you and the little girl, he came back to life again. It’s just now…I think he’s figuring out what to do with that life, if that makes any sense.”
