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Chapter One
Hallie
“One more round!”
As my best friend orders up another round—on me—I look at the fruity drink in front of me that I haven’t even finished yet.
It’s my fault. I’m not a fast drinker. Charity could drink a brawny old biker under the table, but when I drink, I tend to pace myself.
“Come on,” she says, her butt hitting the chair as she sits back down and wraps an arm around my shoulders. “Why are you still on your first drink? It’s a bachelorette party, for fuck’s sake.”
“This is my second drink,” I tell her, though I can see it doesn’t make a bit of difference. “And I know it’s your bachelorette party, that’s why I’m at this loud-ass bar to begin with.”
When we were younger, I enjoyed going out drinking with Charity, but as I approach 26, I’m finding the whole scene a little tired. If I’m being honest, I would have preferred to spend the evening at home in my pajamas, curled up on the couch with my cat.
Even in twenty years, I doubt that will be Charity’s idea of a good time, so instead we’re taking a party bus from bar to bar. This is our first stop, and I think Charity is starting to get bored of the place.
“We need to get you a man,” Charity says off-handedly, like it’s a to-do list item she just remembered to bring up.
“We don’t,” I disagree.
“We do.” She signals the bartender, and he runs right over to get her a shot while we wait for that second round. She throws it back like a champ, then brings the glass down on the bar top with a hard thud. Looking over at me, she says, “I’ve got just the guy for you. When I get back from Bermuda, I’m gonna set you two up.”
I’m shaking my head before she even finishes her thought. We have gone down this road before, and Charity’s idea of the man I need andmyidea of the kind of man I need donotline up. “I appreciate the sentiment, but really, I’m good.”
“I know that last guy didn’t turn out so great,” she acknowledges.
Recalling how rude he was to the waiter and the bathroom break he took which resulted in him returning to the table with white powder residue beneath his nose, my lips thin. “No, it sure didn’t.”
Undeterred, she goes on, “But if at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.”
“An excellent mentality in most cases, but honestly, I’m fine hanging out with Marie and my own company for right now.”
“I feel like you’re afraid to get back out there.”
“I am definitely not afraid to get back out there,” I assure her. “Fatigued, maybe, but not afraid.”
Nodding with remarkable solemnity for an almost-drunk girl, she says, “I get that. I do. Dating can be exhausting when you’re actuallytryingto find someone to settle down with. But I know you, babe. You’re not meant to spend your days with Marie. She’s a lovely cat, sure, but you are a relationship girl. You’re the marrying kind. You are not a future cat lady spinster. You’re just not.”
Sighing, I grab my drink and take a slow sip. “No, that’s not how I see my life going, but honestly, I’d ratherbea cat lady spinster than date someone who makes me feel…” I pause, trying to encapsulate the feelings I’ve been left with after every failed relationship. Finally, I come up with, “unfulfilled.”
“I don’t want that for you, either,” she says. “But youwon’tfeelthat way with the right guy. I don’t feel that way with Tyler, and I’mnotthe marrying kind. If I can find that, you sure as hell can.”
I shrug. “Maybe someday. It’s just not my turn yet, and I’m fine with that.”
Charity shakes her head. “It will never be your turn if you never go out with anybody. Let me set you up. I know the guys I pick for you aren’t usually your first choice, but sometimes the most perfect person for you is someone you never thought to consider.”
I cannot stomach the idea of going out with another of Charity’s picks. I also seldom win arguments with my professional lawyer bestie, so rather than engage, I lean forward and look down the bar. Surely shiny new drinks will distract her.
“And I know, I shouldn’t try to run your life for you,” she says, even though I haven’t said a word. “I promise to get better about that as long asyouget better about stepping outside your comfort zone and taking chances from time to time. It can lead you somewhere really unexpected, but really good. Look at me. Party girl extraordinaire. I took a chance and stepped outside my comfort zone with Tyler, and now we’re getting married tomorrow.Me.Married. Who ever thought you would be the maid of honor atmywedding before I got to be yours?”
It’s true, between the two of us, I am the more romantic. I’m the one who actuallyhopedto find someone to share my life with, while Charity was more about just having fun. No one expected her to get married anytime soon, but then Tyler came along and changed the game.
I’m happy for them, and Iwouldlike to find that special someone for myself, but I’m so sick of dating. It’s exhausting chasing dead-end after dead-end, trying again and again to find someone to connect with and being disappointed every damn time.
After my last hollow relationship, I’m content to be single for a while. I need to recharge, take a little time to myself before I’ll have the energy to dive back into the dating pool again.
My phone buzzes. As if the universe is eavesdropping on our conversation and wants to contribute, the name of my most recent ex-boyfriend pops up on the screen.
