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“I want you and the twins with me, all the time,” he continued. “I don’t want to play this game anymore, Katie. I want you around so that I can take care of you.”
I stared at him. “You want me to move in so that you can take care of the babies,” I corrected.
Adam set his jaw. “That’s not what I said.”
“That’s what you meant, though,” I insisted.
Adam stood up. “Don’t tell me what I feel, Katie,” he growled in the back of his throat, and it sent a shiver through me but I kept looking into his intense blue eyes, not backing down.
“How would I know one way or the other? It’s not as if you tell me,” I said, my eyes burning with unshed tears. Maybe it was just the hormones like Addie had suggested, but Adam still hadn’t told me anything about how he felt about me in particular. He was so excited about the babies, he talked about how he’d love and care for them all the time, but he’d never said those three little words to me.
“Katie, stop this,” Adam warned, but I couldn’t help myself. I’d been so scared that something was wrong with the twins that I’d been happy to have Adam there with me, but now that I knew the babies were fine the issues between Adam and I came back to me.
Toby was a liar, that much had been proven, but it still didn’t prove that Adam loved me. Just like I told Addie, I wanted him to love me back as much as I loved him.
“You have to give me something, Adam,” I cried. “Just tell me how you feel.”
“Isn’t it obvious?” he asked in exasperation. But it wasn’t obvious at all to me. He had such push and pull. Sometimes he’d be affectionate and answer all my calls and texts, but I still couldn’t forget how he walked out on me after the first time we had had sex. I didn’t know which end was up, and I was just exhausted all the time.
“I’m not doing this with you right now,” Adam said harshly, starting for the door.
Addie darted over to him and blocked him from walking out. “Just give her some time, Adam,” she said. “I’m sure she’s scared to death, after what just happened and now having to be on bedrest. She’s not thinking clearly.”
“She knows how I feel about her,” he said in a whisper. “She has to.”
“Maybe, but you still should tell her,” Addie suggested, also whispering. They didn’t think I would be able to hear them.
“I’ll talk to her,” Addie said finally. “Just go and get some sleep. You look like you need it.”
Adam looked at me once more before he left. When Addie came back over to the bed, I frowned at her. “Traitor,” I said, tears slipping down my face.
Addie sighed. “I’m not a traitor, Katie. I just didn’t want you to push him away. That’s what you’re doing, you know that?”
“I’m not doing anything,” I said stubbornly. “He made no effort to try and talk to me for weeks, and then he dragged me to Toby’s house in the middle of the night to prove that Toby was lying.”
Addie stared at me. “Doesn’t that mean that he’s trying, Katie? Doesn’t that prove that he feels something for you?”
“I don’t know that it proves anything,” I said, sniffling and wiping angrily at my eyes. It seemed like I cried over everything lately, but I’d had a long and stressful night.
“He’s new to this, right? You said he’s never been in love before? Well, you’ve never loved a good guy like him before. You’re both doing this for the first time, and you can’t force him to open up to you, Katie. You have to give him the space to do it on his own.” She paused. “And if you keep pushing him, keep testing him, you’re going to lose him.”
Was Addie right? Was I going to end up pushing Adam away? I didn’t want that. He had been there for me consistently ever since he found out I was pregnant. And maybe I was the one who had pushedhimaway, even though he was the one who broke it off. I had believed Toby over him. How could I have ever done that? I knew deep in my heart that Adam was ten times the man that Toby would ever be, and hadn’t that been proven to me tonight?
But I couldn’t stop thinking about the whiskey stench on Adam’s breath, how he’d showed up at midnight banging on my door like a drunken lunatic. Was it only the alcohol talking? Would he go back on his word and start sleeping with me without staying over again?
Maybe it wouldn’t be such a bad thing moving in together after all. I had questions, of course, like whether or not I would have my own room or be sharing his. The doctor had put me on bedrest for the remainder of my pregnancy. Having Alice, Adam and even Colin around would definitely be a good thing.
Addie had made several good points and even she didn’t seem to get where I was coming from, so maybe I was being too pushy. Maybe I was testing him too much. I wanted to hear him say those words so badly, but I couldn’t bring myself to say them first. I was too afraid of being rejected and I knew I couldn’t handle that.
I sighed and looked Addie square in the eye.
“Quick. Go find Adam and ask him to come back and talk to me.”
Chapter 26
Adam
2 Weeks Later
