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“And the sleepovers do sound fun.”
“It will be different and the kids are so dependent, it might be a challenge for a while, but I don’t think this is a bad move.”
“Maybe not.”
“The real question is, are you ready to chase the national buckles?”
Winnie shakes her head in wonder. “Honestly, I’m not sure. I thought I was, but I also thought there was no way I ever could, at least not for years.”
“Fair.” I lean back against a stall and smirk. “Know who is sure, though?”
“You?”
“Well, yeah,” I agree easily. “Of course, but I meant the Queen. Mab was born ready.”
Winnie straightens, sucking in a huge breath and releasing it slowly. “Guess I’d better start practicing, then, huh?”
“Maria’s gonna lose her shit.”
The news I’m no longer aiming for the PBR and am, in fact, leaving for college in a month to attend a nursing program goes over with my dad better than I’d anticipated.
“Texas Tech?” he asks me. His blue eyes crinkle under his hat. He’s sitting on our wraparound porch at sunset, mostly still for once, swirling a large cube of ice in a glass of straight whiskey. He watches the ice continue to spin and clink the inside of his tumbler even after his hand stops moving. Eventually, his eyes meet mine. “They have a first-rate rodeo program there, if memory serves.”
Of course he’s gonna fixate on that. “They do. Already recruited me. I committed to ride bulls this fall since I’m still aiming for the NFR this winter. But I was thinking to maybe try bucking broncs in the future. Or maybe roping.”
The corner of his mouth quirks in a knowing grin. “Switching to equine events, huh?”
I shrug a shoulder, all casual-like. “I wouldn’t mind the challenge of something new.”
“Boy, you could chase all the challenges in the world, but you ain’t got a chance in hell of besting that girl of yours on horseback.”
I snort, easing back into my chair and looking out over the ranch. Thank God for Winnie. At leastshe’sa real cowboy he can be proud of.
“I’m not stupid. I just told you I got accepted into nursingschool, didn’t I? That’s why I said bucking broncs or roping. Not racing. Winnie’d beat me up for trying.”
Junior laughs low in his chest. “Did you see how fast your girlfriend whipped Pistol Annie into shape?Shheet.That girl’s fearless.”
I smile to myself. At least we can agree on that. “That she is.”
“So.” My dad clears his throat after a minute, swirling the cube again. “You want to be amurse. Sure you don’t want to be a doctor? Or a surgeon or something?”
I swallow back a hundred different retorts, but I’ve planned for this. Let him get it out of his system. He can say whatever he wants. I know myself.
“Nope. I want to be a nurse. A pediatric nurse. You think you know what tough is. Not you, specifically,” I clarify, though,yeah, him, “but you’ve never seen tough like a twelve-year-old kid starting his fifth round of chemo after remission. Or a five-year-old who’s spent more time in hospitals than out, still finding a reason to smile every day. Or a seventeen-year-old who’s been told they’re going to die before they’ve had the chance at accomplishing any of their dreams.”
“And you want to be around all of that? Relive what you went through with Walker over and over with each new kid?” Junior shakes his head. “Why the fuck would you want to do that?”
“Because I can,” I say.
“We’ll see,” he says, tipping back his drink. I bristle at the skepticism in his dismissal, but then I see it. The slightest tremble in the hand holding his whiskey. A shake in his composure. And it hits me for the first time.I think Junior is afraid of sick people.
Because he came home one day to his young wife dead onthe ground of the ranch they shared, without even the chance to save her.
Holy shit. No wonder he kept Walker at a distance when things started to look bad.
Being a nurse, seeking a job where I would be surrounding myself with vulnerable kids day in and day out? That’s his worst nightmare.
Junior doesn’t think I’m too weak. Not really. Junior thinks I’mtoo brave.
