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If he wasn’t driving, he’d glare at me for longer. “You’re not aninconvenience.”
“I just mean you’ve already gotten in enough trouble because of me. We’ll take him down without you getting expelledorcharged with assault.”
He grumbles something under his breath about it being worth it, but I let it go, changing the subject to get his mind off it. “I looked into the scholarship Mr. Lewis was talking about, and it’s huge. It would be a big help if I get it. I’m not sure what exactly I want to study, but going away for college is looking like it’s more and more realistic for me. I’m actually really excited about it. I just need to get my math and history grades up a bit.” Ever since Mr. Lewis planted that seed in my head, I haven’t been able to let it go.
“You will,” Jason says. “You’ve been working hard.”
I have been. I’ve gotten a little derailed with Brandon and the break-in, but for the most part, I’ve really been trying to pull my grades up.
“I’ve never really thought too deeply about college because I feel guilty leaving Gia. I always said I’d take her with me, but realistically that can’t happen, I know that, so I pushed it off. But I think Gia’s all right here, and maybe I should put myself first for once and actually do it.” Even as I say it, I feel guilty. I’ve never been apart from Gia before, except when it was court ordered while I was arrested, and that was incredibly hard.
Jason turns onto a dark back road surrounded by trees. The lack of streetlights plunges us into a comfortable darkness, and the wind coming in through my window is fresh and smells like pine.
“I know it’s hard, but you can’t always be there to take care of Gia. She’s going to have to learn to take care of herself eventually.”
I bite my nails, then rip them from my mouth when he raises an eyebrow at the action. “Are you and Jackson planning on going to the same school?” He’s a twin; he’s not used to being away from his brother any more than I’m used to being away from my sister.
“I’m not sure yet. We’re currently not agreeing on where to go. He’s looking at schools based on location, because he wants to go somewhere where it’s warm all year round, and I’m actually looking at the quality of programs.”
“Would you feel guilty if you chose different schools?”
Jason makes another turn, pursing his lips as he considers the deeper implication of my question. “It’s my life, and at some point, you have to stop making decisions because of other people and start putting yourself first.
Jackson is my brother. He isn’t going anywhere and he would understand, just like Gia would if you went away to college.”
I’m not sure. As much as I’ve been researching and considering, I’ve never had a real conversation about it with Gia. I’m not sure how she’d take it.
I’m about to reply when a sound in the distance cuts me off. My eyebrows draw together as I strain my ears to listen.
“Um . . . Jason?” I ask, lowering the volume of the radio. The sound of the siren becomes as clear as the deserted country road in front of us.
“Fuck,” Jason mumbles. The flashing police lights illuminate the forest around us and the inside of the dark car, highlighting Jason’s sharp profile, his clenched jaw, his tensed muscles. “I thought taking the back roads would avoid this.”
He takes a deep breath, and his eyes flash to the rearview mirror, where the police car is trailing us. He grips the steering wheel, and for a second it looks like he’s considering stepping on the gas to lose them, like he did when we first met on a road eerily similar to the one we’re on.
“Jason,” I say gently to break him out of that train of thought, since that’ll do nothing but get us into more trouble and make things even worse.
He exhales the breath he was holding with a sigh and signals to pull over.
“I’m getting really fucking annoyed with this shit,” he grumbles, pulling his wallet out and finding his license. “I was only doing like five over at most.”
“I know,” I huff, equally pissed. “But what can we do?
Tell hisfriendsat the station and hope they reprimand him? They don’t care.”
“Fucking small-town bullshit,” Jason mumbles.
“Maybe I should get a dashcam so I can prove he keeps pulling me over for inconsequential bullshit.”
There’s a tap on his window, and Jason barely schools his expression into mild annoyance as he rolls it down.
The siren is off, but the lights still flash in the darkness, lighting up the car and Officer Liu as he bends to look in the window.
“License and registration,” he says, voice monotone.
Jason’s teeth grind as he hands over the documents.
“You’ve seen my license and registration more times recently than I have.”
