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“Holy shit!” I exclaim, then start laughing, but the laugh causes me to lose my balance and pitch forward, and my life flashes before my eyes. Before I go headfirst over Jason’s shoulder and destroy my face on the ground, he quickly adjusts to save me, so we both tumble to the lawn. We land in a pile together on the grass, Jason taking the brunt of the fall, but neither of us is hurt too badly if the laughing is any indication.
“That was so stupidly dangerous,” I gasp from where I’m sprawled on top of him.
“It was.” He grins. “Let’s do it again.”
“Absolutely not!”
“But I think we can—”
“We’re not doing that again.” I cut him off, and he relents with a chuckle.
“Fine. But you weren’t going to get hurt. You know I had you, right?”
The humor slowly fades with that statement as I gaze at his face. I know he had me. Jason always has me.
“I know you did,” I tell him, brushing back the hair plastered to his forehead.
He sobers up at my words, and I’m drawn in by the intensity in his eyes, completely incapable of looking away. His chest rises and falls beneath me, and one hand grips my waist to hold me in place while the other runs up my spine and clutches the back of my neck. He smells like earth and dampened soil and something entirely Jason, and my stomach somersaults when his hand tightens its grip on my neck. His lips are full, and his nose is straight, and even though he’s so devastatingly handsome that it’s almost overwhelming, it’s who he is as a person that makes me feel so weightless and complete.
Sometimes I feel like he’s so perfect for me, I was never actually acquitted for Stan’s death, and I’m still locked up, just making Jason up in my mind.
His voice is a husky whisper when he asks, “Do you always stare at boys who are completely and utterly in love with you, or just me?”
My heart stops as I take in his words. “You’re in love with me?” I whisper.
“Completely and utterly,” he repeats. “I’m so in love with you it sometimes scares me.”
My breath hitches and my mind blanks, and for a moment I fear I may burst into tears.
Jasonis in love withme. Me! This boy, who’s so caring and intelligent and sweet and thoughtful and considerate and can have his pick of any girl, is in love withme!
Other than the rare occasions Gia does, I haven’t heard someone tell me they love me in so long. A small part of me thought that maybe I was the problem, that I was unlovable, but that can’t be true becauseJasonis in love withme!
And as we lie here in the mud and rain, and I look right into his beautiful eyes, I know for certain how I feel about him. He listens to me, truly listens, and makes me feel heard and understood like no one else ever has.
His presence is an instant comfort, letting me know that everything is going to be okay just because he’s here now. I’m captivated by his smile, by his laugh, by that spot between his brows that furrows when he’s deep in thought, by the way his voice softens when he speaks to me. All my worries and problems, even the whole world, fade away when I’m with him, and all that matters is me and him and the way we make each other feel. He’s the only one who’s ever really seen me forme, and I know that I am, and probably always have been, in love with him.
“I love you too,” I admit with a shaky voice, like I’m scared that saying it aloud will burst this dream I’m in and send me hurtling back to reality. But those fears are baseless, because this isn’t a dream, and Jason smiles that perfect smile he reserves just for me and blows out a relieved breath.
“Thank fuck,” he says, making me laugh before he pulls my head down to meet him for a kiss.
The moment his lips touch mine, my entire body is overcome with a feeling of joy, ofrightness, like it knows Jason is and always will be the person for me. His lips are soft and warm, moving against mine with a tenderness that makes my heart flutter and sends electricity through me. Our mouths fit together perfectly, as if they were made for each other, and I lose myself in the taste of him.
He deepens the kiss, and it becomes more urgent and passionate as we ride the high of our admission. We’ve kissed plenty of times, but this time feels different. This time, we’re kissing as two people wholoveeach other, and that magnifies every touch, every taste, every sensation.
We’re completely lost in each other as time stands still, like we’re the only two people in existence. Jason’s heartbeat is fast against my chest, mirroring my own, and it only fuels the fire burning within me.
The rain falls harder, but it only adds to the beauty of the moment. How beautiful that the first time I met him, I was alone and sad while lying in the rain, and now here we are, lying in the rain together, in love.
We finally pull apart, but Jason doesn’t release his hold on me. I rest my forehead on his, our breath mingling in the damp air. His eyes lock with mine, and his are filled with the same love and desire I feel in my own heart.
“I think dancing in the rain is my new favorite thing to do in the universe,” Jason admits. “Especially if it always ends like this.”
My laugh is giddy and free, and I’m so high on Jason I never want to come down. “I didn’t think it would get any better, but like everything, it’s ten times better with you.”
A boyish grin spreads across his face as he states, “You know you’re stuck with me now, right?”
It’s the best thing I’ve heard in forever.
