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Nikolai stepped beside Vrail. “When the seals are broken we can build more ships.”
“Perhaps.” Vrail bit her bottom lip but was unable to contain the rest of her thought. “But the last of the mapmakers died in the Purges. There are some records left that document the process, but it would be hard to replicate from texts alone. And we would need a water wielder—”
Nikolai gave Vrail a playful nudge. “We can weigh the difficulties when we’re back in Myrelinth. But until then we need to sleep.” Her turned to me and whispered. “I left your things in your room.”
My throat burned knowing exactly what he meant.
I took the opportunity to follow Vrail and Nikolai to the lower deck where we each had our own room. Riven had climbed to the top of the highest mast and was watching the horizon. It would still be another hour until the sky was dark enough for Riven to feel comfortable going to bed. His shadows were the only thing we had to mask our ship if we met any unexpected sailors.
I opened my door and collapsed onto the mattress. My body was exhausted from the day of travel and heavy use of my magic, but my mind roared like the water thrashing against the hull outside. I opened one of the wineskins Nikolai had left on the bed and swallowed.
The cravings hadn’t disappeared entirely, but I couldn’t deny that they had lessened. The elixirs Riven had given me were working. My headaches could be managed well enough each morning and I could keep enough food down to recuperate from training. But there was still a part of me that longed for night to come. Not because the wine let me sleep without worry that Damien would find me, but because for those precious few moments before sleep came my worries were washed away. Though the numbness always made the pain that much sharper when I woke.
My hands shook as I took another sip. I didn’t know what we would find on that island. The reports from our spies in the capital said the island appeared empty apart from a few patrols of Damien’s soldiers.
But they didn’t concern me.
I was worried about the bodies. What had Damien done to them? Did he bury all those Shades when he was done torturing them? Or did he set them alight in a giant pyre for the entire city to see?
Bile crawled up my throat at the idea that we would find them rotting away in the hall where it had happened. I took another swig of wine. I hoped the others didn’t find them first.
Part of me wanted to run out of the room and tell everyone the truth. But at least by keeping it a secret, that meant no one would do something stupid while we were so close to the capital. Riven charging into the palace in a blind rage would be exactly what Damien wanted and I would not allow it.
But I was scared to fall asleep.
I picked up the open wineskin and swallowed it all. I no longer tasted the wine and only felt the heaviness of it in my belly.
I opened the second skin and drained a good part of that as well. I laid on the pillow and watched the fine grain of the upper deck swirl. But no matter how long I laid there, sleep didn’t find me.
Something cold crawled up my leg and I looked down to see one of Riven’s shadows. It pressed tightly into my calf with a sharp edge that left a thin line of amber blood along my skin. I jumped out of bed and pulled my cloak around my nightgown to cover my scars, before opening the door into the lower deck.
Riven’s shadows were scratching at the walls, leaving deep grooves in the wood as they slithered from under his door. I opened it and saw the large outline of his body in the bed. The only source of light was the small faelight that had followed me from my room, everything else was blanketed in shadow.
Riven was thrashing in his sleep, his brow furrowed and covered in sweat. I tripped on the edge of the carpet and fell onto the bed beside him. He bolted from the mattress and swung his arm, sending a cascade of sharp shadows at the door.
I grabbed him and let that familiar current pulse through both of us. “It’s just me,” I whispered, trying to call forward myhealing gift. The warm magic trickled through my fingers and flowed down Riven’s arm to the thick red slashes his shadows had left behind.
“Keera?” Riven’s chest heaved in relief and he fell back onto the bed.
I grabbed his hand and watched his shadows disappear along the floor. “Bad dream?”
Riven’s jaw pulsed and he shook his head.
I rolled my eyes and slid farther up the bed. I trailed a finger down the sharp hook of his nose and tapped the point. “You don’t have to be strong all the time. No one expects that of you, Riv. Especially not me.”
He moved closer to the wall and made more space for me. I didn’t move, holding his gaze until he answered the question.
Riven sighed. “I’m not having nightmares, but the pain seems to be getting worse.” His eyes dropped to the bed, unable to look at me.
I stilled. “How much worse?”
Riven shrugged and I shoved his shoulder.
“Bad enough that I can feel it even when I sleep.” Riven swallowed.
I grabbed his hand and felt themiiskwithirconnection once more. “Does this help?”
His lip turned up at the side. “You always help.”
