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Leaning down, he kisses my forehead. “Do you want me to?”
I sigh. “No.”
“Well then.”
I groan childishly and flop my forehead onto his chest. Aiden wraps his arms around me, and, when he chuckles, the deep sound of it vibrates against my skin. “WhatcanI do to make you feel better?” he asks. His hand moves in slow circles over my back.
“Honestly?” I push back so that I can look at his face. “Ask me what you want about the business. The only thing I’m still sure of is that I want you to find out what happened to Lizzie.”
He steps back almost instantly. Walking to the counter, he picks up his coffee, and, although I don’t likethe distance, I think he needs it more than me just then. It’s like he needs the physical space for his objectivity.
He doesn’t say anything for a bit as he thinks where to start. He sips his coffee, his eyes far away.
Needing a distraction, I pull out a bunch ofTupperwarefrom beneath the kitchen counter and walk over to the cookies I still have to box. As I begin to pack them, Aiden wanders over and takes a seat opposite me. When I hand him a white chocolate and macadamia nut cookie the size of my hand, he takes it with a quiet, “Thanks.”
“They seemed to be the ones you gravitated towards yesterday.”
He takes a bite. “They’re my favorite. My sister, Shannon, makes them for me. But I usually have to bribe her with something ludicrous. And,” he lowers his voice to a dramatic whisper, “if you tell her, I’ll deny it—they can’t hold a candle to these.”
“Yeah?” I try to imagine his sisters. What they look like and how they must love having a brother like Aiden. Someone who’s always looking out for them.
“Yeah, Shan’s a real hard ass. Always strict. Militant. Unless you know how to worm your way under her skin, then she’s all gooey on the inside.”
“Kids?”
“Two. Twin boys. Mikey’s the dinosaur-loving monster. But Jake devoured five of the six cupcakes you sent over—they loved them by the way. My other sister, Jenny, has one girl.”
“You like being Uncle Aiden?”
“Oh, yeah.” Walking to the counter, he picks up his phone. “Here. Look.” He passes it to me. On the screen, two boys, maybe six years old, wear identical grins as they hold a pair of my dinosaur cupcakes.
“They’re adorable.”
“And they shamelessly exploit it.” But he doesn’t sound the least bit unhappy about it, and, when I sneak a look at him, he’s smiling. “My sisters guilt me into babysitting at least three times a year. And I am not, under any circumstances, allowed to miss birthday parties or holidays.” He shrugs. “It’s nice, when you’re a bachelor. To have people to go to for the occasions.”
It brings such an unexpected ache to my chest, hearing him talk about his nephews and niece, that all I can do is nod and hope that he doesn’t see right through me.
I’m not that girl—the one who dreams about getting married and having babies. I haveneverbeen that girl. Not even when I was clean and could choose any future I desired. But there’s something so intimate about Aiden, sitting in my kitchen with no shirt, talking to me about his family while I box cookies, that, for just a moment, Iwantthat life. The Nurse Catherine Beauchamp life, except this time with him and two kids and a dog.
“Did you know that Elizabeth was pregnant?”
The question takes me so completely off-guard that, raising my head, I stare at Aiden, my cookie-filled hands frozen mid-air. “What?”
Lizzie, pregnant? My mind scrambles to make sense of the statement.There’s no way.
I don’t realize I’m shaking my head in denial until he pushes to his feet and comes to stand behind me, his hands rubbing up and down my arms. “I’ll take that as a no.”
“How…” Turning to look up at him, I ask, “Are you sure?”
“Yes. The autopsy results put her at fifteen weeks.” The way he says it is quick, a simple recounting of facts from the LAPD lieutenant who’s taken over.
“Oh, my God.” The tears that fill my eyes are real.
Lizzie was pregnant…I think back on our last weeks together in Clementine Lane. I try to remember if there were any signs, any indication that she knew. But nothing sticks. Things seemed normal. And Lizzie was still working, right up until the day she disappeared. “Toni couldn’t have known either,” I say, still shaking my head. “She would have pulled her clients until Lizzie decided what to do about it.”
“It’s happened before?”
My head snaps up and I meet Aiden’s eyes. He is trying to keep his expression neutral, but I can see the glimmer of fear. “No,” I say, inexplicably needing to justify myself. “We don’t have unprotected sex.Ever. Forget pregnancy, the STIs aren’t worth the risk.”
