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‘Yes. It was … crazy.’ It had been tough, those early years. A dying mother, Dan’s condition. Aunt Bea’s health failing. She’d had no choice but to agree with Grace’s offer of help, and the conditions she set.
Morgan got to his feet, his expression drawn. It made him look his age in a way he hadn’t while he’d been with the children. ‘I know you have other commitments, but I want to spend as much time as I can with Gabby.’
‘And Edward?’
‘And Edward if he wants to join us. He’s a nice kid and they’re extremely close, aren’t they?’
‘Very close. You can’t split them up.’
He scrubbed his long fingers through his hair. ‘I’m learning that. You don’t mind if Edward spends time with us?’
Becca stared at him, wondering why he was labouring the point. ‘Why should I? I trust you to look after them properly.’
‘What about Dan? Will it make problems there?’
‘Dan finds them difficult. They can be pretty rambunctious. You’d be doing him a favour.’
‘It’s an attitude I can’t understand. If I were …’ He seemed to swallow his words. ‘I appreciate you being so good about this.’
‘As you said, you’ve missed out on years of growing up. I’m always aware of how much.’
His eyes darkened, the bright blue a pale ring around the pupil. ‘I’ve missed a lot of things.’
He seemed too close suddenly, looming over her, his male scent spicy with a touch of basil from the pizza enveloping her. She swayed forward, inhaling his never forgotten essence. Clean soap and Morgan, his sensitive skin meaning he couldn’t use fancy perfumed deodorants and aftershaves. There was an almost medicinal undertone this time, but not unpleasant.
His mouth was so close, all she had to do was stand on her tiptoes and she could taste him. What would he taste like now? Pizza, coffee? Something essentially him?
‘I should go.’
In a daze, she watched him withdraw, picking up his car keys from the table. ‘Okay. Goodbye then.’
He couldn’t get away fast enough. Only pausing with the door half open. ‘I’ll contact you about seeing the children. I promised Edward I’d help him withLa Pinta.’
‘Sure. Um … you could come to the birthday party next weekend if you’re free? At the Hot Bread Place around three on Sunday.’
He nodded. ‘Will do.’
The door shut behind him with a thud and his steps reverberated as he went down the broken stairs. She must get them fixed. At least they were fixable.
She pressed one hand against the tightness in her chest, feeling the slamming of her heart against her ribs. One thing that wasn’t suitable for mending.
Her knees shook and it wasn’t the reverberations from the wonky floor. Morgan was gone, heading out to his car. She flopped down on the nearest chair.
She’d almost kissed him. He had to have known.
Why else would he have run from the place as if pursued? By a needy woman who hadn’t had sex in forever. No different from the needy girl she’d been at sixteen. Of course, he hadn’t turned her down back then. He’d been nineteen and she’d known what boys were like. Morgan had admitted at the last he’d been no different to the rest. He’d been looking for an easy lay in the holidays and she hadn’t been exactly shy about what she wanted. She’d wanted him. Any way she could get him.
It wasn’t as if she was totally innocent at sixteen. She knew the facts of life. She’d been pushing Dan away for months, from the moment he’d realised Morgan was interested in her. He’d been wild when he figured out she’d given it up for Morgan Cavanaugh. If the accident hadn’t happened, she’d known it was only a matter of time. With the drink and the drugs, he was out of control.
She expelled a shaky breath. The guilt was still there, after that first moment of relief when he’d come home from rehab and she’d known immediately the threat was gone.
After the twins were born, she’d had plenty of propositions from guys who thought she’d be an easy lay. Married guys, single guys. They didn’t care, so long as they thought they could get some. She hadn’t been tempted for a moment. The twins had to be her first priority; she didn’t need to add to her already tarnished reputation.
She’d thought of leaving town once her mother passed away. Grace had offered to make her an allowance to help pay for the twin’s care. Becca still didn’t quite know why she hadn’t taken the offer. It might have been possible before Aunt Bea came home with Dan. They could have all started somewhere else.
By the time she’d finished her training at the nursing home and the business degree at the clinic there was no time for second thoughts, the children were at school and she didn’t want to uproot them. Once the promotion at the clinic came up, she hadn’t considered moving again.
At least Morgan had a reason to keep her on at the surgery. If she lost her job, she’d have to leave town and he wouldn’t want the twins to leave. Not when he was making a connection with Gabby. He’d made it clear enough. Today he seemed to have found something in common with Edward which gave him two reasons to stay. Two reasons to let her keep her job. Unless she blew it by letting him see she was attracted to him. Not hard at work, but if he was going to start coming by to visit the twins, she’d have to make sure not to give herself away.
