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A few seconds later another text from Josh comes through the screen. This time, not from the group text that I didn’t realize it was earlier.
Josh:Holy shit. How am I supposed to look her in the eye on Monday?
Josh:Oh bollocks! I hope that Tess didn’t see that and it cause problems for you two after she was already questioning who Keri was.
Josh:She’d know it was an accident, right?
Barrett looks up at me since I’m still reading everything on the screen. I roll my eyes again and mutter, “Fine. You were right. I’m sorry. But I had reason to question.”
“You’re right. You did. But you also didn’t. Tess, do you have that little trust in me?”
He quickly fires off a text to Josh saying that they will talk later and throws our phones on the bed before shifting his focus back on me.
“I’m waiting, Tess. Do. You. Not. Trust. Me? I’ve only been one-hundred-percent faithful to you for… oh, I don’t know, twenty-seven years now. It’s probably been my fault. What with giving you so many reasons to question my loyalty and all,” he says irritably.
“I’m sorry, okay? I know I jumped to conclusions but with everything that’s been happening over the last week, do you blame me?”
“Yeah, I do, actually,” he says looking and sounded irritated. “Tess, what does this say about us if you immediately assume the worst? That you don’t even take the time to ask me what that could have been about?”
I blow out a frustrated breath just as I hear a loud bang against the door and the soft whimpers of a child. I open the door to see Harper sitting on her butt, staring at the door and holding her forehead.
“Why is your door closed? And locked?” she mutters, looking up at the both of us from the floor. She looks adorably frumpled.
Barrett steps around me and swiftly picks her up and starts walking back to her room. “Because, baby girl, you need to stay in your own bed. Mommy and Daddy need to talk… about your Christmas present.”
The liar. But it must work. I hear him murmuring softly to her followed by the quiet click of her door shutting. Soon he’s coming back into our room and shuts the door again. His shoulders lift as he takes a deep breath and blows it out before turning around and facing me with his hands on his hips. He looks enormous. And angry.
“Tess. I’m going to ignore this. I’m going to do what Keri pleaded with us to do and forget it ever happened. I’m going to get back into bed, pull you close, and go back to sleep. You know why I’m going to do that?”
I shake my head from side to side, frozen in my spot.
“I’m going to do that because if I don’t, all we’re going to do is argue. And I’m tired of arguing over the same damn thing all the time. I’m tired, Tess. You know the truth in your heart. Reach for it,” he bites out. I know he’s angry. Frustrated. He deserves to be. I don’t know why I’m feeling this way. It’s as if I’ve lost all self-confidence. Maybe it’s because I’m tired or getting older or maybe it’s as simple as the fact that I haven’t felt wooed in months. Whatever it is, I need to get control of it before I screw up our relationship for good.
“You’re right.” I sniffle. “I know I’m just being paranoid and letting trouble in.”
“You are. And it ends, now. Alright?”
I take a deep breath and nod my head as I reach for him and wrap my arms around his waist and give him a tight hug. I kiss his chest and mumble, “Alright. Got it.”
He sighs heavily and kisses the top of my head. “Good. Now get your ass in bed. We’re going to lie down together, I’m going to wrap my arms around you, and we’re going to sleep. We’ve had a really lousy weekend, and we need the rest.”
We settle in and, even though I can tell that neither of us are over it, that neither of us are going to sleep peacefully, at least we do it not angry. At least we do it in each other’s arms.
Chapter Twelve
Barrett
If the past weekend wasn’t insane enough for us to deal with, Andy and his boys are moving in temporarily today. While I’m happy to help out, I’m also on edge. Our family hasn’t exactly had a great few weeks, and things with Tess and I are just… well, they’re not at our best right now. I wish I could go back about five months and remove the damn blinders that both of us apparently were wearing so we could see what was happening, but I can’t. It’s almost as if our Friday night interruption and then what happened with Grady that just amplified everything, set us back by years. I feel so disconnected with her. In all our years together, even when we were young and still new in our relationship, she’s never questioned me. Never questioned my faithfulness. She always trusted me. To feel like I’m losing that trust quite frankly pisses me off.
Lately, if it’s not about the kids or our jobs, then we stare blankly at each other or down at our phones. Allowing the almighty electronic distraction to take over our marriage is sad. But it’s way more than that. About four months ago, Tess chose going to a design show over being home and celebrating MaryEllen’s years of service with us. If I had to be honest, that’s when it changed. I don’t blame her. I blame myself for telling her I didn’t care. I think, in the end, I hurt us both. I cared. I just didn’t want her to miss out on something important to her. And she was hurt that I said I didn’t care. So we both shut down.
And the result?
This.
Our living hell.
My Girl:Did you get the air mattresses pulled out of the closet in the basement for the boys?
