AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Oh.
Oh, no.
I remembered.
Cris loved music as well. It’s another one of the reasons we got along, debating the classics. He mentioned taking an independent study in music. “You signed up for that class?”
“I signed up for that independent study. Needed a professor who’d work with my basketball schedule.”
God. “So you saw us there?”
His jaw clenched again. “Saw enough.” He glanced in the direction Jude had gone, and I felt the simmering heat come from him. “Saw enough to know that I’ll never listen to that douche’s music.”
Guilt pressed down on all the other emotions already there, taking root in me, and none of them were going to move away until I processed it all. This, right now, this would’ve been a time when I needed to numb myself. With sex. With alcohol. With other things. Whatever worked.
Feeling all of it in me, hurting me, I rasped out, “If I could go back—”
“No.” Cris moved in, his front against my front, and he leaned his forehead to mine. His body was so tight, so tense. His own tension making him feel like cement. “Listen.” A woosh of air left him, and with that so much of his tension left. His hand lifted, cupping the side of my face. He said softly, “I don’t do regrets. Okay? Don’t let that shit fester in you. I had an uncle who lived only in regret. I don’t think it helped him, so I hate that emotion. I won’t feel it, and I don’t want you to feel it. What happened, happened. The only good thing about looking back is learning how to do things better. Let’s do that instead?” His head lifted, his eyes still holding mine.
No regret? I drew in a shuddered breath. “I don’t know if I can do that.”
“Then I’ll help you. Let me help you.”
I nodded, taking that from him, knowing I could take that from him.
He cradled my face in both of his hands, his thumbs smoothing down over my cheeks. “You good?”
No. But I said, “Getting there.”
“Good.” He dipped his head down again, his mouth finding mine, and just like in his truck, the desire didn’t take long to build. A deep groan left him as he bent, his hands falling from my face, going to my ass, and he lifted me up.
My arms and legs went around him, and he carried me to his bedroom.
I’d had sex with Cris a lot, but this night was different.
It was more.
It was deeper.
I was pretty sure it was with love.
17
MAREN
STILL LATER.
The response to the article was overwhelming. It was mostly good, turning so many things upside down. There was some bad, but it was how the world worked. There’d always be bad. I only focused on the good, and a big good thing that happened was that Kellie was kicked out of school.
I rolled over in bed with Cris one night. “Tell me again what Cahill said to Ryan.”
That was another of the changes that happened.
He shrugged, lying beside me with one of his arms around me. His other hand was playing with mine, and he was looking up at his ceiling. “You get off on this shit, don’t you?” He glanced down at me.
I gave him a wolfish grin. “Maybe.”
He snorted, grinning. “Cahill was pissed when he found out about that article, and I mean pissed. His parents are suing her because he never wanted Ryan off the team. He was just an asshole, wanting to be top dog. That’s it. Ryan is the reason he didn’t go pro early, because he knew with him joining, we could win March Madness. The team came so close last year.”
