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She bundled me in her arms, hugging me so tightly before she set me down again. She rocked back on her heels. “I can’t take you with us. I’m so sorry, Billie. You need to be here because of what you saw yesterday. You know what I’m talking about, right?”
Pain burned me, and it jolted me in the present again.
“Jojo,” I managed to whisper.
“What?” Travis asked.
My mom nodded, her tears wouldn’t stop. “I’m going to take your brother with me so he won’t turn out to be like him. Okay? He’s going to go with me, but you can stop that bad man.”
“The bad man?”
Fear gripped me now—fear of the bad man, fear of whatever my father had done to my brother, fear of what my mom was saying. What was she talking about? I couldn’t understand.
“Mom,” I said aloud. “What are you going to do?”
“Billie!” That was Travis’ voice. Sharp. Angry.
“You’re not going to see me again, or your brother, but don’t for a second think it’s because we don’t love you. We love you so much. I will always love you. And in his way, your father loves you too, but you need to stay away from him. Okay?”
She spoke more urgently, pressing my hand in hers. “You need to listen to me so that you’re safe. You need to go to the police, and you need to tell them who you saw yesterday. I know you saw the bad man. You can describe him. It’ll be enough. They’ll catch him. I know you didn’t tell the police you saw him, but you did and you need to be brave. You need to go to the police, tell them who you saw. And, Billie…”
She started choking, hiccupping on the words. “There will be a time when they ask you who your parents are because they won’t be able to get in contact with me. Listen to me very carefully. You do not tell them your father’s name. You need to forget who your father is. They’ll take you away, and they’ll put you with other people, and I will do everything in my power to make sure you get a good family. He won’t come for you. That’s the only thing he’s ever promised me. So you’ll go with other people. Good people. People who will love you and protect you. I’ll make sure of it, okay? But you can’t tell them who your father is. That way you’ll be safe. Okay? You can do it. I know you can do it. You’re a very brave girl. You always have been.”
She looked over her shoulder, as if someone was coming, then turned back to me. “I love you so much. Never forget that. Ever, Billie. Ever.”
She tore herself away, and after a moment there was a cry in the distance.
“Mom!” I wanted to go after her, but she was already gone.
I opened my eyes and ached. It was happening all over again. I was back there, back outside the police station as she was leaving me behind.
I wanted to go after her.
But no, that was back then.
Ben had been in the car with her. She left me at the bench across the street, then ran to our car and took off. She and Ben.
That was the last time I saw them.
Time spun around, bringing me back to now with a sob in my throat. I folded over. It was like losing her all over again.
“You need to start talking, Billie,” Travis demanded. “Or I swear to God, I’ll—”
I lifted my head, and for a moment, I hated him. I hated where I was. I hated everything because I just had her back. I’d give anything to have her back in my life. One more hug from her.
Travis cursed, his face pale. “You scared the shit out of me.”
I gulped, my fingers curling around my flashlight. “What are you doing here, Travis?”
I expected him to drop the wall, show me his true self.
But he only shook his head in confusion. “I told you. Broudou sent me. That girl who was staying at his place, her friend and a guy showed up. He was threatening them. They’re fine now. The officers took the guy in, but Broudou felt he needed to stay back. He couldn’t get ahold of you. Neither could I. Plus, I was going to see if Vicky and Howard were here. I couldn’t get ahold of them either.”
Wait. I was confused now.
“Vicky and Howard just got back. I saw their light on. They’re probably in bed by now.” I stopped, looking him over. He seemed normal to me again. The same Travis as before. He wasn’t…
I was losing my mind. I must’ve been losing my mind.
