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He expelled a ragged breath. “Fuck.” He shook his head, scooping me up and shifting so I lay on top of him, propped on the pillows. My legs fell to the sides of his, first from surprise at the sudden change, and then hunger lit up inside me.
I was starving for him.
The need erupted.
But I held back, even as his hands went to my thighs and began kneading. I placed a hand on his chest, finding that I loved feeling his heart, knowing how he was affected. It was racing right now. “What does this mean?”
He shook his head, his gaze lingering on my lips. “It’s your decision.” His voice was rough. “But if anything happens to you—”
I leaned in, my mouth touching his to quiet him. “We have contingencies in place,” I whispered. “We’ll set new ones.”
I’d moved to kiss him again when his hand went to the middle of my chest and pushed me upright. “You have what in place?” he asked.
I sighed. “Do we need to get into this now?”
His eyes grew sharp, and I was in the air again as he lifted me, carrying me out of the room and into a different one. The lights flipped on in his bedroom. He set me on his mattress and backed up, his hands at his hips. He clipped out, “Explain them. All of them. Don’t leave anything out.”
Disappointment weighed on my shoulders. This was going to take us a whole different direction than I’d hoped for.
But there was no way around it, so I told him everything.
“You know how to shoot a gun?”
I nodded.
His nostrils flared. “And what do you mean you know how to use a knife?”
“I’ve taken lessons in Arnis martial arts. It specializes in—”
“Knife fighting. I’m familiar.” His eyes were still so sharp. “You have a gun in your car?”
I nodded. “I don’t carry it on my person. I don’t feel comfortable doing that. If a gun is pulled, no matter the situation, it’s usually perceived as a threat.” I stood, going to him.
He backed away more. “Don’t. I still need to think.”
I paused, feeling completely vulnerable and exposed. “What is there to think about?”
“I have enemies in my life. My sister, for one. If she finds out about you, she’ll use it somehow. I don’t know what she’ll do, but she’ll weaponize you. That will happen. There’s no if there. My sister is a calculating bitch. The only thing that’s stopped her from really wrecking my life is that she can’t afford to get the fuck out of California.”
I nodded, accepting that.
He scowled. “That should terrify you.”
I shrugged. “I mean, look at my baggage…?”
He barked out a short laugh before cursing under his breath. “I’m terrified of hurting you. I couldn’t—I don’t know how to protect you against some sick fuck out there.”
“You can’t. That’s why we have all the contingencies. And if it gets out about you and me, we’ll make more.” I chanced it, going to him again. This time, he held still, watching me come with lidded eyes. He watched my hand move toward his chest, and as soon I made contact, he yanked me against him.
I squeaked as his hands slid down my ass, smoothing to the backs of my legs as he lifted me up. So easily.
I wound my legs around him and looped my arms around his neck. I was flush against him. Eye to eye. Mouth to mouth.
He searched my gaze before falling to my mouth. He walked me to his bed and shook his head as he lay with me. He started to roll to the side, but I wouldn’t let go, my legs squeezing until he had to stay where he was, right on top of me.
He shifted to balance his head in his hand. He gazed down at me. “If you get hurt…”
I slid a hand to the back of his neck, pulling him close, and I whispered, “Then you can say ‘I told you so.’”
