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The entire day was all about Brindley and spending time with her. We all rotated in the NICU with her once the doctor was in to check her out. He doesn’t see anything wrong with her and is going to start weaning her off of the oxygen a little bit at a time on a daily basis. Once she gets off the oxygen and can remain off of it, she’ll be able to come home. He also told us that he believes her stomach was just a little upset yesterday and that’s why she wasn’t eating. Other than that, he doesn’t foresee her having any other issues than what we know about at this point in time. I’m so happy nothing else has happened to her and she’ll hopefully be coming home sooner rather than later.
When we’ve been in the NICU with our daughter, my heart has been broken so many times. There are babies in here that don’t have anyone spending time with them other than the staff. Others who have loving parents coming in as often as they can and spending hours with their baby only to have alarms and everything else go off. Those are the scariest moments because we’ve actually been here when a baby has coded. Thankfully the staff were able to get them back and they didn’t have a problem since then. I cried and held Brindley a little closer after those occasions. I can’t even imagine what those parents are going through and want to do everything I can to support them.
“I’m sorry guys, visiting hours just ended,” Andrea says, coming up to us as I get ready to hand my daughter over to her.
“I know. It’s just so hard leaving her today because I get to go home and she can’t come with us,” I tell her, my eyes filling with tears.
“I know. That’s the hardest part for so many. I get off my shift soon, but I’ll be here tomorrow. And we all know you’re gonna have someone outside the room. We’ll keep them, and you, updated with anything that happens as it happens. What you need to do is go home and get some rest. We all know you don’t get much of that in a hospital with the staff constantly coming in and out of your room. I promise you, we’re gonna take the best care of Brindley. She’s got Beth as her nurse tonight and I’ll make sure she has all your numbers,” Andrea tells us as I lean down to give Brindley a hug and kiss before we leave.
Handing her over to Wicked, he holds her close for a minute before kissing her head.
“I love you, baby girl. Mommy and Daddy will be here first thing in the mornin’ to spend our day with you. You be good for the nurses tonight. I love you so, so much and will be thinkin’ of you all night long,” he says, his voice hitching with the emotion coursing through him.
Andrea takes Brindley from him and gets her settled back in the bassinet and under the light. Once she’s taken care of, Wicked gets me back in the wheelchair and we head out of the NICU. Meeting my dad and Brick in the hallway after disposing of our gowns, we spend a minute talking to them.
“We’re not leavin’ here tonight. Brick and I will watch over our angel and call you both if anythin’ happens. Our girl’s a fighter though and she’s gonna be home before you know it. Go get some rest and we’ll be here in the mornin’ when you get back. Eat some good food and take it easy. If you need to check on Brindley, call us and we’ll let you know what we see and talk to a nurse to find out if anythin’ has changed. I love you, little princess,” my dad assures us, leaning down to kiss my head and hold me for a minute.
“Love ya, sis. I’ll keep a close eye on Brindley. Our little angel won’t have anythin’ happen to her,” Brick says, his voice washing over me because I know he won’t let anything happen to his niece if he can help it.
You’d think he was a doctor and can control that shit with the way he talks. We both know he can’t, but he’d give his life for hers and it only makes me love my brother even more for it. It only takes a second before Brick is standing back at the window with his eyes only on the room Brindley’s in.
Wicked finally pushes me away from the NICU. With every foot we get, the tears fill my eyes and start overflowing. I can’t handle this. I don’t want to leave here without Brindley. By the time Wicked has us in the elevator, I’m a sobbing mess. I can’t see anything in front of me and I’m hiccupping from crying so hard. Wicked rests his hand on my shoulder and I can feel it shaking. It’s not from me crying either. He’s shaking with his own emotions. Taking a deep breath, I try to control myself as I look up at Wicked. He’s got tears falling down his face and doesn’t give a shit who sees that. We’re leaving our world behind and there’s nothing we can do about it.
Once we’re on the main floor, we’re met with my mom, Otter, Willow, Brantley, Gage, and Riley. They all form a circle around us but don’t try to say anything as Wicked and I let our emotions out. Our family is at our side, giving us silent support when we need it. They follow us to the truck that someone’s pulled up to the front doors. Wicked helps me in the front passenger seat while Otter takes the wheelchair back inside. Gage, Riley, and my mom get in the back of Wicked’s truck while everyone else piles into Otter’s truck. We leave the hospital behind as my heart breaks even more.
By the time we pull up to the clubhouse, I’m sobbing uncontrollably once again. Wicked helps me out after parking as close to the door as he can get. Holding me in his arms, we take a minute to just be us and let everything we’re feeling out. No one leaves our side until we’re ready to head inside and face everyone else. Gage steps in front of us and opens the door so we can get inside. What I see has me stopping in my tracks and more tears falling.
“Welcome home!” everyone shouts as I take in the common room of the clubhouse.
Everyone from all three chapters of the Wild Kings are in the common room. It’s been decorated in everything pink and purple. There’s balloons, streamers, tablecloths, banners, and everything you can think of filling the room we all gather in daily. Venom and Vanessa make their way over to us from the middle of the room.
“We know you’re in no mood to celebrate after leavin’ your daughter in the hospital, but we all want you to know how much you both mean to us. We’re here for you no matter what and will do what we can to make this time as easy for you as possible. If you only want to get somethin’ to eat before headin’ to your room, we all understand, but this is for your family and celebratin’ the newest member of our family. We’re celebratin’ you makin’ it through a major surgery and comin’ back to us instead of givin’ up the fight, Quinn. We all love you guys and want to show that love,” Venom says as Vanessa gives me the biggest hug. I once again let the tears fall as we make our way in the common room and to the closes table.
As I continue to look around, I spot the corner of the room that’s been filled with gifts for the baby. I thought we were gonna have to go out and buy everything for Brindley, but it looks as if we won’t have to get very much with the enormous pile of things in the corner. Our family has certainly outdone themselves and this means more to me than I’ll ever be able to tell them.
Wicked goes to get us each a plate of food and something to drink. I still have medicine to take and need to have food in my stomach when I do take it. We eat with his parents and my mom while everyone else finds chairs where they can. There’s so many of us in here some of them are even eating at the bar because there’s not enough tables. Everyone makes their way over to talk to us throughout the time we spend in the common room with them. I try to last more than an hour, but it’s really pushing it. I’m exhausted and just want to be alone with Wicked.
“You ready to head to our room?” Wicked finally asks me after Grim and Bailey leave us.
“I’ve been ready. I’m so exhausted,” I answer him as my mom makes her way back over.
“You guys aren’t in the room you were before everything happened,” my mom says as she stands at my side. “We have one more surprise for you before you close yourselves off for the night.”
Our family leads us to the room the officers of the club have their rooms in. Instead of being closer to the end of the hall where we were, my mom stops at a room in the middle of the hall. She hands us a key and we open the door to find our things in the new room. There’s a bassinet sitting at the end of the bed that’s already made and ready for Brindley to come home to use. Looking around the room, I move inside and toward the door that’s open off to the left of the bed. Reaching in the door, I turn on the light and gasp in shock. The room has been painted a light purple and completely decorated for Brindley.
On the back wall, there’s a handcrafted crib I know came from Pops. It’s what he does with every new family member. There’s a bedding set already on the bed and a mobile hanging with little bears dangling under an umbrella. Brindley’s name is spelled out in wooden letters on the wall over her crib. In the corner is a rocking chair with a blanket draped over the back. A changing table sits close to the crib. It’s already stocked with diapers, wipes, and a ton of other things. There’s pictures already filling the walls. They consist of members of our family, her ultrasound pictures, and a few of just Wicked and me over the years. Our family did this for us and it looks amazing.
“I don’t know what to say,” I tell everyone, as I turn to face our family. “We love you all so much and couldn’t have done a better job in here if we did it ourselves. This is perfect.”
“We just wanted to help you both out. We love you. Now, we’ll get out of your way so you can get some rest. If you need anything, I won’t be far,” my mom says as she hugs me before giving me a kiss on my temple. After hugging Wicked, my mom ushers everyone from the room and leaves us alone.
“Maddox, I’m sorry,” I tell him as I remove my sweatpants but nothing else and climb into bed.
“What are you sorry for, baby?” he asks, stripping down to his boxers and climbing into bed with me.
“Because I can’t give you more babies. I’m still working on making it make sense in my mind, but all I get stuck on is that I can’t have any more kids. Brindley is the only birth child we’ll have,” I tell him, rolling over to face him.
“Baby, it doesn’t matter if Brindley is our only child by blood. There are so many babies out there who need love and a good home. If that’s the route we have to go to fill our house with kids, then that’s what we’ll do. For now, you’re gonna take your medicine and I’m gonna hold you as you fall asleep. As soon as we wake up in the mornin’, we’re gonna go back to the hospital and see our daughter for the day. I love you, Quinn Wilson. You’re my world and Brindley is the light that takes away the darkness. That’s all I’ll ever need, baby,” Wicked tells me as he pulls me into his arms and gives me a tender kiss.
