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I leave the light off and finally walk over to Milo’s bed.
It feels so empty without him in it, especially now.
All I want is to curl up in his strong arms, to wrap myself around him and get the assurance I need that we’re okay and we’ll continue to be okay no matter what.
I don’t know what to do about Jonathan. I don’t know if I should tell Milo. I’m afraid telling him would make things worse instead of better. Would he really take my side against his own son? I know my mom sides with her romantic partners over me, but I don’t think that’s a thing good parents do.
I love that Milo is a good dad, I just…
I don’t know where that leaves us because his son is horrible.
I need to clear Jonathan Granville out of my head, so I look at the bed I’ve had such lovely moments in.
Milo wanted me to sleep naked in his bed tonight, but I’m a little afraid to. Yeah, I locked the bedroom door, but for all I know, there’s a key and Jonathan knows where it is.
I picture stripping off all my clothes and climbing naked into Milo’s bed. Curling up under his blankets, the sheets twisted around my bare legs.
It doesn’t feel safe, but I want to give Milo what he wants, so I do it anyway.
Once I’m naked and snuggled up beneath the covers, I try to close my eyes and fall asleep, but I can’t. My body is still very much stimulated, and my nerves are a wreck.
I need to relax, and thinking about what Milo said when I was downstairs earlier about wanting to smell me on his sheets…
I close my eyes and let my hand slide down between my parted thighs. I grab his pillow and pull it close, the cool silk grazing my nipples and making them hard. A faint noise slips out of me as I push a finger into myself, rubbing my tits against his pillowcase and imagining Milo watching me.
I think about him watching me touch myself in the dressing room, and about kneeling at his feet and taking his cock down my throat. I think about how it felt when he pressed the cool water bottle against my skin, and when he covered my mouth and made me come.
My fingers move faster over my clit as I think about that last part, but some wire crosses in my brain, maybe interpreting the move that could have felt violent and illuminating the more recent act of sexual violence against me.
My heart hammers as Jonathan Granville springs to mind, grabbing a fistful of my hair and shoving me hard against the bedroom door.
No!
I try to push him out of my mind, summoning Milo as I roll on my side, using my legs to pull his pillow close to my pussy.
There.
Peace fills me, his handsome face in my mind. I picture him kissing his way up the inside of my thigh, his hands braced on either one as he spreads me open and devours my pussy. He’s playing with my tits, too, and it feels incredible, his big palm covering one while he squeezes my nipple with the other.
Wait, that’s not right.
Milo only has two hands, and they’re both on my thighs.
My fantasy turns dark again as I imagine opening my eyes only to see Jonathan Granville is the one playing with my tits while his father eats me out.
“You just love Granville dick, don’t you, stray?”
No.
Fuck.
It’s too late. I try to stop it, but I’m too close. Pleasure rocks me as my body shudders in the wake of my orgasm, but it doesn’t feel good like an orgasm should. It feels inky and guilty and a little sad.
I feel worse than when I climbed into bed by myself.
I just want Milo to be here with me.
I should have gone home.
