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I saw them all grow up together, witnessed the hero-worship up close.
“Nevermind,” I mutter, then sip some more of my drink.
“These burgers are great, huh? Always taste better outside.” Harrison takes the seat on my other side, appearing oblivious to the lingering awkwardness between me and Mark. He takesa hearty bite of his burger and then nudges my knee with his. “How’s the animal shelter?” he asks once he’s swallowed.
“Uh, good.”
It’s weird to remember I don’t have to go in tomorrow. All summer I’ve worked on Saturdays. But Susan was thrilled when I called her to ask if it was okay to take the day off, saying Jackie would be happy to cover my shift and that she was happy I was “finally having some fun.”
“Any new arrivals?”
“Not this week. Which is good. We’re almost to capacity.”
We’ve only run out of space a couple of times since I started volunteering at the animal shelter in elementary school, but it’s extremely stressful. Not only does it make caring for the current residents more of a challenge, it means we can’t take in any new animals. They get shipped to Morrisville instead, which is a kill shelter.
“Jackie really loves working with you.”
I smile. “I love working with her too.”
Harrison keeps asking me questions about the animal shelter, which gives me something to focus on as I eat the rest of my dinner. And when Holden walks by with his food, taking a seat on Mark’s other side.
I can’t discern anything in his expression that indicates how he feels about his friends sitting with me. Harrison has always acted like he’s as much my friend as he is Holden’s, maybe more. But Mark’s behavior is more unusual, and I have no idea what to make of it.
Finn suggests playing 21 as soon as everyone finishes eating. I’ve participated in the numbers game before, but never this tipsy. It’s much more of a challenge to keep track of what was last said and what leap was made. I miss the change in direction twice, but luckily I’m not up next either time. We’re a large enough group, so it takes a few minutes to go around. I spendthat time staring at the flickering flames and downing more lemonade.
Grace fakes a yawn after the sixth round ends. “I’m bored of this game. Let’s play something different.”
For once, she and I are on the same page.
I’d rather enjoy the sleepy buzz of alcohol than have to stay focused on numbers. My pride is the only reason I’ve kept up so far.
“Truth or Dare?” McKenzie suggests.
I roll my eyes behind the cover of my cup.
“Nah, let’s do Two Truths and a Lie,” Finn suggests. “Mark to Grace, you’re team one. Everyone else is team two.”
There’s rumbled agreement around the campfire. I sip more lemonade, which chases the increasing chill in the night air away. A piece of wood shifts in the campfire, sending sparks flying upward toward the dark sky.
I’mverynervous about heading to bed. The sleeping logistics were another thing I didn’t think through when I impulsively decided to show up here. Since I told my mom I was headed to the city for a girls’ weekend with Sydney, dragging an old tent out of the basement wasn’t really an option. Like pretty much everything about this trip, I decided I’d figure it out when I got here.
Scanning the faces surrounding the fire, it’s obvious who my only option is. There’s no one else here who I’m comfortable sharing space with, even with the awkward tension humming in the air.
Ridiculously, I’m anxious about sleeping next to him. We haven’t been that close to each other in months.
Physically, at least. There will still be an emotional gap.
It’s obvious in the way our eyes won’t meet, how one of us glances away as soon as they do. We haven’t exchanged a single word since he gave me his second burger.
I’m almost as aware of how everyone else is tuned in to our distance, how McKenzie and Grace exchange looks after noticing Mark seated between the two of us.
I’m sure plenty of rumors about our relationship status are swirling amongst the popular crowd, but I still have no idea what—if anything—Holden has told his friends about us.
Another disadvantage on my side.
Equally maddening is the suspicion McKenzie confirmed earlier: it’s all because of Holden. No one cares about my relationship status, much less happiness.
“Brooks, you start,” Finn says.
