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I stand still, registering the cheers but not really hearing them. This moment feels distended, like something I’m watching on a screen but not experiencing firsthand.
Finn jumps on me, screaming in my ear. Mark is right behind him and so are a bunch of the other guys. I spot Grace and a few of her friends standing behind them.
Declan approaches. “Holden! Amazing, man! You’re—”
I cut him off. “Send me the money, okay?”
“Yeah, sure. Just—”
“And I’m done.”
His smile falls. “What?”
“I’m done.”
“Holden, we could make a ton of money. Don’t—”
I turn around and walk away. Finn is the only one who follows me. “Want some?” He holds out a Gatorade bottle I’m willing to bet doesn’t contain any Gatorade anymore.
“No. I’m driving.”
“Driving? We’re partying, Adams. You knocked him down in a few minutes, dude! Come on, let’s—”
“I’m leaving, Finn. Do you want a ride or not?”
He studies me for a minute, then shakes his head. “Nah. I’ll catch one with Mark.”
“Okay. See you.” I open the door.
“You sure you’re good?”
“I’m good. He barely grazed me.”
It’s not true. My ribs ache. But I’d rather deal with it at home, not here. My dad ended up extending his current trip. Once he’s out on a route, there are always extra deliveries to pick up, and he took advantage once again.
“Okay. You don’t usually dip out so early, though.”
“I’m tired. You get in the ring next time, see how you feel after.”
Finn raises his hands as he starts to walk backwards. “Okay, fine. Text me tomorrow, yeah? I got that new video game.”
“Yeah, sure.”
I climb into the cab of my truck and exhale. Slam my sore hand against the steering wheel.
I’m tired, yeah. But I’m going home, hoping to see her. Wondering if she saw the essay and cared at all.
That makes me feel pathetic, not victorious.
CHAPTER FIVE
CASSIA
The digital numbers on the stove change, displaying the start of a new hour. I glance down at the glass of water that’s been my sorry excuse for standing here for the last twenty minutes, annoyed with myself.
I’m not sure why I was so certain he’d be home by now.
Why the fact he isn’t feels like a personal affront.
