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“Being away from you has made me realize just how much I want to be with you,” I tell her. “I think about you every day. Nothing else seems important to me anymore. I even blew the last competition because I didn’t want to leave. Ended up wasting around here so long I missed it completely.”
She smiles a rueful smile at me. “I wondered why you were still around,” she comments.
“Could you give me another chance?” I stare at her, hanging on her answer. I hold my breath without even realizing I’m doing it.
“I don’t know, Renxel. Your actions hurt me a lot. I can’t help but still feel betrayed by how you’ve behaved. And an admittedly thoughtful bunch of flowers doesn’t negate the fact that you slept with me and then ghosted me for weeks.”
She is right, of course. It was a shitty thing to do.
“I know,” I tell her. I take a deep breath. I’m not used to being honest about my feelings, but I know it’s the only way with Mira.
“I got scared,” I tell her. There it is, spoken out loud. “My parents were always so miserable when I was growing up. They put me off ever having a serious relationship. I’ve never allowed anyone to get close to me before. When I met you, it was the first time I really considered anything more than a fling, but I didn’t think I had it in me.”
She looks at me, not with pity but with understanding. “Yeah, they seemed pretty harsh on you when I saw them in the lobby that time,” she says.
“My mother likes to get her way all the time. I’ve watched my dad give up everything he loves for her because it got in the way of her life. He is the shell of the man he used to be.”
“And you think that I’m like your mother?” There is no accusation in her voice. She simply asks the question.
I am speechless for a moment.She is nothing like my mother.The revelation hits me.
“No,” I say, giving a little laugh. “You are not like my mother. And I’m sorry that I judged you in the same way.”
Mira smiles at me, and my world lights up. I feel hope blossoming in my chest as I realize my admission may well have saved any chance of a relationship with her.
“My mom has always been a bit of a tyrant,” I tell her. “She comes from royal blood and is used to being obeyed. When I was a kid, I thought it would be fine if my dad just stood up to her. If he stopped caring so much. But he always just rolled over and gave her whatever she wanted.”
“He must really love her,” she says, a hint of sadness in her voice. “But love is a two-way thing. It has to work for both of you, and you were right, your dad allowed her to do that to him. He could have trusted in her love and said no.”
Again, Mira’s words make me think. Did my father really always give in because he didn’t trust that my mother returned his love? She certainly never acted like she did. But they were fated mates, so she must have loved him.
“A relationship needs to be worked on honestly by both partners,” Mira goes on. “And you need to understand that if we’re going to continue. We both have to be honest with one another about our feelings.”
I look at her as the meaning of her words sinks in. She is giving me another chance. I can’t help myself as a massive smile spreads across my face. “So you think we can try again?” I ask, feeling elated.
“I’m saying, we’ll see how it goes. I still feel hurt and betrayed by what happened. It will take some time before I can build up trust in you again. But I’ve been pretty miserable since you walked out of my life, too. I think we could have something special. But let’s take it one step at a time.”
“I’ll take that,” I say, I want to jump up and kiss her, but I’m pretty sure that’s the opposite of what she just asked for. I don’t want to push my luck. “Maybe we can go out on a date tomorrow?”
“A date would be fun,” Mira replies.
17
MIRA
The day is full of anticipation as I sit up in bed. The early morning sunlight is pouring in through the window, promising a glorious spring day.
I smile. Even though I’m trying desperately to guard my heart, I’m elated that Renxel is back in my life. His honest declaration and open apology have me hopeful that we can actually get things back on track.
As I get ready for our rendezvous, I find myself humming. He told me it was a surprise. The only hint he’s given me is to prepare for a hike. As I pull on my boots, I wonder what he has in store for me.
My musing is interrupted by a knock on the door. “Coming!” I call, trying to suppress an idiotic grin.
“Good morning,” he says as I open the door.
“Morning,” I say, flashing him a smile.
I’m glad he doesn’t try to kiss me, I’m not quite ready for that.
