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I rub my lips together, attempting to shift through my hazy thoughts and work up the anger to tell him to fuck off. “I think you already heard me. That’s why you look like an angry panda bear right now.”
He blinks at me, a flash of confusion flickering in his eyes. It hastily evaporates as he shakes his head, pushes away from the doorjamb, and strides over to where Jessa and I are sitting. Then he stops in front of me, leans over, fixes his finger under my chin, and tilts my head up to look at him.
“You’re stoned,” he states in disapproval.
“No,” I lie, and I can’t tell if I do a good job or not.
“Yes, you are,” he accuses. “I can tell.”
I shrug. “Who cares? You get stoned all the time. Well, you used to.”
He skims his finger along my chin. “I know that, but this is different.”
“Why? Because it’s me, and you want to tell me what to do?”
“No … I just …” He lowers his hand from my chin and scratches his arm. “With how important this ceremony is, I’d have preferred you have a clear head.”
“And I’d rather be all hazy and out of it so I don’t have to acknowledge what’s going on,” I retort, causing the muscle in his jaw to tick. “Besides, I don’t know why you’re making a big deal out of it. Reece is high, too—and he gave me the gummy.” As soon as the clumsy, stoned words leave my lips, I want to retract them, because Ryder’s entire mood shifts, tension coiling around every part of his body.
Without uttering a word, he spins around and storms out of the room. I have a feeling he’s about to yell at Reece.
I tell myself I don’t care, because I don’t.
The problem is that, beneath all the haziness and being high, I know that’s not true.
I do care, and I absolutely hate it.
TWENTY-ONE
RYDER
The instant I leave the room, I march toward the dining room entrance where I last saw Reece. I find him where I left him before I took off to check on Allura, partly because I wanted to see her and partly because I’m worried she’s going to try to run.
I’ve known that girl since we were kids. She’s wild and rebellious, and I’m honestly surprised she hasn’t tried to run yet. Then again, she knows as well as we all do that the only way to escape this world is in a coffin.
Since a few family members are loitering around in the dining room, I snag Reece’s arm and pull him back. “We need to talk in private,” I whisper while dragging him farther away from the room.
Instead of fighting back, he sighs. “I saw this coming the moment you went to check on our future bride.”
I keep my lips fused until we’re safely tucked away in a small bathroom connected to the foyer. Bathrooms are the only places in this house that aren’t under surveillance video, so I can speak a bit more openly here.
“If you knew it was coming, then why did you do it?” I snap. “She needs a clear head for the ceremony.”
He rolls his eyes. “Why? Because you want to marry her while she’s having a panic attack? Is that your thing now?”
I glare at him as I recline against the counter. “You know that’s not why. We may have caught the family that made threats on her, but that doesn’t mean that her—or any of us, for that matter—are safe.” I push away from the counter and lower my voice. “And if we want things to go smoothly, she needs to have a clear head.”
He grinds his teeth as he stares at the sink area. “This isn’t how this was supposed to go.”
“The plan is working just fine,” I assure him. “We just need to stay on track.”
“No, not the plan. The fate ceremony. We should have been able to do this our way, with Al wanting it. But she doesn’t. She doesn’t want to be with us.. She doesn’t want us. I can see it in her eyes when she looks at me.”
“Is that why you helped her get high? Because you didn’t want her to look at you like that?”
He shrugs. “Partly. But I also just wanted her to relax—she deserves that.”
“I know. But you can’t get off track yet. You can spoil her all you want once this is done. Until then, I need you to stay strong, or everything will fall apart.”
