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But I keep running out of the room, up the stairway, and into my bedroom. There, I shut the door and lock it before I collapse to the floor and hug my knees to my chest. A sob wrenches from my chest as I lower my head to my knees.
I thought Ryder, Reece, and Blaise were the ones to break me, and part of me is furious for them not trusting me enough to be part of their plan. But most of my soul is shattering over what my father has done to me.
I know he’s a cruel man.
Cold.
Soulless.
A monster.
But he was also my father, and knowing he was part of the cause behind some of the worst moments of my life is devastating.
Did my mother know, too? I feel like she did.
My chest aches with the truth, and it’s so crushingly painful that I feel like I’d do almost anything to make it go away.
Maybe it’s time to say my final goodbye.
Maybe it was time a long time ago.
THIRTY-FOUR
REECE
“Ryder,” I say as I run toward him, my fingers wrapping around his arm as he reaches the kitchen area.
I knew the moment those horrible words left Allura’s lips that he was going to do exactly this.
“Let me fucking go.” He swings at me, but I duck without letting go of his arm. “Reece, I swear to fucking God, if you don’t let me go, I’ll end you now.”
“Don’t be overdramatic,” I reply with a shake of my head. “You won’t knock me out, just like you’re not going to go kill Levi. And deep down, I know you know you won’t, because if you do—if you kill Allura’s father’s capo—we’re all dead.”
“Only if he finds out,” Ryder bites out, struggling to breathe evenly as he glares at me.
The guy is usually calm, except for when it comes to anyone hurting Allura. It nearly destroyed him having to do what he did, but he was able to look at the long-term goal in order to do it. And that’s what I need from him now.
“You want to take that risk?” I question. “You want to go kill him and cross your fingers no one finds out? You want to risk your life—mine, Blaise’s, Al’s—for that?”
His chest rises and crashes. “No, but how are we just supposed to let it go? How are we supposed to let him get away with raping her?”
I smash my lips together, attempting to come up with an answer myself. The truth is that, while I’m remaining calm, I feel the same storm raging inside me, but I handle it differently.
I glance at Blaise for help, but he’s gone. “Where the hell did Blaise go?”
“He probably ran after Allura,” Ryder replies, yanking on his arm.
This time, I let it go. “Good. He’s probably the one who should be checking on her.”
Because he’s the softest, and she needs that right now—calm hugs, soft brushes of fingertips, assuring kisses.
“We’re going to figure this out,” I assure him. “Levi won’t get away with this, but we have to be careful and cautious, like we were with the bounty plan.”
He shakes his head while scratching his arm. “Maybe, but killing him is only part of the problem.”
“What’s the other part?” I wonder.
“That he technically won the bounty,” he stresses while carrying my gaze. “Which makes me wonder why he hasn’t collected on it.”
