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She slammed a door on the excruciating memories.
“Do you need to head back to the fire station?” She glanced at Austin. She knew from Sam's schedule, the firefighter paramedic crew were usually scheduled for twenty-four hours on duty, then off for forty-eight, unless they were needed for additional shifts.
“Nope, I'm off duty as of this morning.”
“Did you get much sleep?” She had driven him back to the fire station last night after he'd brought their suitcases in and had gotten them settled. It had been late before she'd tumbled into bed, close to two in the morning. He must have gotten even less sleep than she had.
“Enough.” He shrugged again offering a crooked smile. “I'm used to interrupted sleep with my schedule. It's hard to sleep after the adrenaline rush of fighting fires. Although I have to admit, it was more difficult than usual last night, knowing you'd moved into a house on Puckett Street without telling me.”
She focused her attention on her food, wishing she could think of a way to avoid this conversation. “I mailed a change of address note. And there's nothing wrong with living on Puckett Street.”
“Yes, there is. None of my friends live there,” Josh argued.
Lindsey stifled a sigh. She and Josh had been over this too many times to count. “I’m sure you’ll make new friends. And I've been driving you over to your friend's house as often as I can.”
Austin frowned. “I didn't get a note.”
He hadn't? She frowned, knowing she'd sent one. “Must have gotten lost in the mail.” She tried to change the subject. “Do you know what caused the Tolliver’s fire?”
“Faulty electrical wiring.” He finished his meal in record time, the same way Sam always had. Must be part of the firefighter’s strategy—to eat quick before the next call. He held her gaze. “Your house has the same footprint and likely built by the same company, so I'd like to have a professional check out the wiring before you move back in. Especially now, with the potential water damage, too. We drenched your house pretty good to prevent the fire from spreading.”
Her heart sank. What he said made sense, but she didn't want to be dependent on him. Hadn’t she become too dependent on him the last time he tried to help? Staying with Austin was dangerous to her emotional well-being. Being independent was important to her, now more than ever. “Can you get someone out there first thing Monday morning? I’m working day shift tomorrow.”
Austin slowly nodded. “I’ll see what I can do.”
It was on the tip of her tongue to suggest she could make her own arrangements, but then realized she had no idea where to start. How many electricians did she know? None. Obviously, she would be stupid to refuse Austin’s expertise.
At least for this. But if he tried to take over other aspects of her life, she'd have no choice but to leave.
“Can I be excused?” Josh pushed away from the table. “Tony and I want to go skateboarding. He’s glad I’m back in the neighborhood.”
Austin opened his mouth as if to respond, but then closed it again when she raised a brow in his direction. She turned to her son. “Sure. Be back home by dinner time though.”
“Thanks, Mom.” Josh disappeared from the kitchen.
“I appreciate you not interfering,” she said to Austin, admiring his restraint.
“You’re welcome.” He hesitated then added, “Lindsey, I know the last time we saw each other, you were very angry with me. I'm sorry if you felt I tried to take over your life. I never meant to hurt you in any way. I care about you and Josh—you’re Sam's family for heaven's sake. You must know I only want to help. Please, make yourself at home here, okay?”
He was being too nice. Again. She tried not to feel guilty as he threw her words back at her. She had told him to stop interfering in her life and to leave her alone. During those first few weeks, right after Sam's death, Austin had been glued to her side. In the early days, she'd appreciated his strength and compassion, but after a while, when he'd continued to make decisions for her, especially related to Josh, she'd gotten annoyed. The fact that he was so attractive didn't help.
If she were honest, she'd admit that she'd pushed Austin away for two reasons, her attraction to him and because he had been trying to take over her life. Both were equally dangerous. She needed to remain strong enough to resist him. “I know you're only trying to help. But I need you to understand how important it is to me that I stand on my own two feet.”
“Is that why you sold Sam's house?”
“No.” She stood and cleared the breakfast dishes from the table. “You cooked, so it’s only fair I clean up.”
He caught her arm. “Did you sell the house because you couldn't afford it?”
“What difference does it make?” She subtly tried to tug her arm from his grip.
“It makes a lot of difference. I could have given you the money to make your house payments until you received the company life insurance payment.”
“I don't want your money, Austin.” She jerked out of his grasp. What part of being independent didn't he understand? She wasn't like her mother. She didn't need a man to survive. She could manage just fine on her own. “My financial situation isn't any of your concern. Let's leave it at that, okay?” She turned and busied herself with washing their dishes, hoping and praying Austin would leave it alone.
Austin tried to stay out of Lindsey’s way for the remainder of the day. It wasn't easy. His three-bedroom home didn't seem nearly as spacious with Lindsay and Josh staying there.
Not that he was complaining. He was grateful she'd allowed him to help this much. He didn't understand why she was so dead set against leaning on him for support. It didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out Sam must have left some debt. As Sam had died on the job, Lindsey should have gotten a nice payment from the company's life insurance policy.
