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"Adder," Mirri murmured tiredly.
Bach smoothed out his clothes and spoke without looking at me. "It's fine. Though I'd prefer not to get assaulted for my service." He rubbed his abused chin.
The men were all sharing looks of snide amusement as the carriage slowed, hopefully signaling the end of this awful carriage ride.
I clenched my teeth together, embarrassed by how I'd let my guard down in my sleep. "I hate you all," I snapped.
All the small, snarky smiles and passive-aggressive jokes stopped, and I realized what I'd just said. We were all acting like children here. And someone had to attempt to be an adult. "I didn't—" I tried to correct myself and apologize, explain that I hadn't meant that literally. But Fife interrupted.
"I think we're all quite aware how you feel about us," he snapped. "And it could hardly be love, after how you toyed with our emotions and kept us in the dark."
And that was the moment I reached the last tenuous limits of my patience.
"Oh, shut up!" I snapped, flipping the blanket off me, and struggling to drag on my wet cloak over my damp shirt, since I didn't even warrant a drying spell in his eyes. "Just shut the fuck up, all of you!"
Balefire shifted to raven form and let out a harsh caw that was ear-splitting in the confined space. His red eyes glowed as he perched in my lap and glared at the threat that was my mates. Weird, needle-sharp teeth protruded from his beak. I cupped my hands around him to keep him from launching at the surrounding males.
"You think you know everything!" I spit at Fife. "All of you," I spared a glare for Bach as well. "Every single one of you is so hung up on your offended pride and your damned morals. You haven't even given me a single chance to explain my side of things. You've all just decided I must be the enemy. You think you know my feelings, and yet you've never once asked me what they were. You acted as though you'd give up everything for me when you thought I was nobody. But now that you know who I am, I see it was all a lie." I couldn't have meant that much to them, if they could so easily hate me now.
I shook my head, tears falling now, part rage and part wounding. "If that's how you want things to be, then fine. Have it your way. I won't explain anything to you ungrateful jackasses. I'll be the evil monster. But don't you, for one single second, dare to tell me how I feel. Not when you're the ones being so hateful."
Shoving past them, I opened the carriage door and launched myself outside, nearly falling on my face in the process. There was a hiss of pain from somewhere inside, then Balefire came flapping out into the night, a ruby drop of blood falling from his beak. I didn't know who he'd taken a chunk out of, but at the moment, I didn't much care.
"Come on," I snapped to the bloodthirsty pooka, holding out an arm. He landed on my forearm, his sharp claws digging into my skin through multiple layers of clothing. Right now, I'd love to let him eat the fae males in that carriage. But I also couldn't stop my eyes from overflowing, and I didn't want the assholes to see me crying over them.
I stomped past the guards with my head held high and made my way to the tiny inn, where I planned to drink myself into oblivion and sleep until someone dragged me out of bed in the morning and forced me to ride.
Chapter 3
If I thought the day couldn't get any worse, I was sorely mistaken. We'd sent a messenger bird ahead to notify the Last Light inn that we were coming and to reserve rooms. But it seemed the missive had been misplaced and forgotten. When we arrived, most of our party rain-soaked and desperate for dry lodgings, we were informed that the inn was nearly full. There was only one room available.
"I think I might be cursed," I muttered to Commander Currant as we attempted to sort out sleeping arrangements.
"For what it's worth," the indomitable guard said flatly, "The innkeeper apologized. And they've offered us free dinner and drinks."
I sighed. "Tell them we'll gladly pay. Mistakes happen, and I'm not some entitled noble."
Current snorted. "You are a noble, though, my lady, despite how set you seem to be on forgetting it. The royal family just finished showing their favor by hosting a tournament in your name. Let the innkeeper suck up to you a bit. It'll calm their fears."
I chuckled. "You mean let them give us free food and drink. For their own good, of course, and not because you and your fellow guards are dying to stuff yourselves and drink every drop of liquid relaxation you can find."
She smiled back at me and clapped me on the shoulder, not treating me like a noble, but an equal, despite what she'd said a moment before. "Now you're seeing the way of things," she informed me.
I rolled my eyes. "I'll gladly pay for you all to be well fed. You've more than earned it after riding in the rain all day and putting up with my grumpy countenance."
Sighing, I glanced at the four males who were currently speaking with the innkeeper on the other side of the room. Currant followed my gaze and frowned. "Not keen on spending the night with your new mates?"
I smoothed out my face into something I hoped looked bland and unconcerned. "Whatever do you mean? They're lovely males."
She snorted. "They're certainly nice to look at, though I prefer the ladies myself." She quirked a brow at me. "But a person would have to be blind, deaf, and mentally incapacitated to miss the tension between the five of you."
I waved away her concerns. "Nonsense." Bach was right about one thing; appearances mattered more than I cared to acknowledge. Clearly, I needed to do a better job of making it look like we were all getting on. It wouldn't do to have word get back to Larkwood's people that their steward and their newly appointed co-stewards couldn't stand each other.
My people didn't deserve that kind of unease and mistrust in the people sworn to look out for them. I wanted them to feel secure with this new arrangement, and with all the other changes that were coming. It was my duty.
Squaring my shoulders, I plastered a slight smile on my lips and made my way over to the group of men by the stairs, Currant trailing behind me.
Bach met my eyes as I approached, and his own polite expression didn't waver as he spoke. Ever the dutiful noble. "My lady, I was just finalizing arrangements with the innkeeper, but we'll want your input, of course."
