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“I don’t know.” I shrug.
“The label said you’d be hard to get close to.”
“They want to set us up, huh?”
He shrugs. “They suggested I get close to you, and it’s not like I had any complaints, but you seemed to be getting cozy with Wes.” I flinch a little at his name. I really wish I was with him right now.
“Yeah.”
“So, what do you say?”
“To?”
“Us being friends. Or more.” He says with a slight laugh. “I’m not coming across very well, am I?” I shrug. “I’m drunk. I’m sorry.”
“I’ve had a really long day. Can I think about it?”
“Of course.” He smiles. “I’ll see you around, Abbey.”
“Yeah.” I am trying to smile at him, but the corners of my lips refuse to turn up, remaining in a straight line as he walks away.
I check the time. It’s barely twelve-thirty, and I wish I hadn’t come to this. I take another sip from the bottle.
“Abbey.” Someone says as I walk around. I look up. It’s Haley and her two friends. “Have you seen Wes?” She asks. I shake my head. “No? You two were glued at the hip earlier.” She smirks.
“Some history can’t be erased.” I throw her words back in her face with a shrug.
“I’m glad you understand.” She smiles. “No hard feelings?”
I shrug. “Okay.” I say and take a sip from the bottle.
“You know you guys can’t be friends now, right? Everything you guys had is over.”
We said we’d still be friends, but she was right. We can’t. There are too many feelings, and of course, she wouldn’t like it- she wouldn’t have it at all.
“He is going to be mine again.” She adds, like this is some kind of high school movie, and she is the popular cheerleader, while I’m the loser, nobody.
“Okay.” I take another sip. “Are we done here?” I place my hands on my hips. If she wanted to act tough, I could, too. Though it would take a lot more effort on my part, than it seems to take for her.
“Yes. I think so.”
I don’t wait for her to walk away before I turn around and walk towards my bus. I’m done being here. I’m going to hide out on my bus until the car comes.
I climb onto it and curl up on the couch. I took another sip from the bottle and let the tears start to fall.
The last few days were some of the best I had ever had and were all for nothing. I’m without a friend again. I’m all alone again.
No reason to eat. Well, except to make it to 120 so I could have my freedom to go back to not eating because there would be no one to not disappoint anymore. I have no reason to try to be better now. Sue was right. I was getting better for the wrong reasons, for a guy.
Because the guy I love got another girl pregnant.
I don’t think I can come back from this. I’m so tired of treading water. I thought I finally had a shot at something good, but good things don’t happen to me.
I’m sobbing now. I set the bottle down and curl up in the fetal position.
I lay there crying for I don’t know how long before my phone starts to go off. I wipe my eyes and look at my phone. It’s Wes calling, and while I desperately want to answer, I can’t stop crying.
I miss him. I miss his arm around my shoulder, his lips on mine. I miss him so much. In just a few days, I’ve become too dependent on him, and now I’m left feeling all alone without his presence.
