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“Sure,” I said, attempting to push my personal turmoil aside and focus on my professional responsibilities. But my emotions refused to be suppressed, bubbling beneath the surface like a volcano on the verge of eruption.
I made my way upstairs, finding Alexander alone in an office that Eric was letting us use while we were there. I rapped my knuckles on the door, and he looked up.
“Here are some reports from Michaela,” I said as I handed him the papers.
“Thanks, Olivia,” he said, his eyes lingering on me for a moment longer than necessary before returning to his work. It was in that fleeting moment that I was reminded of the passion we once shared, the fire that had burned between us.
“I’m going back to the hotel. I don’t feel well.”
He nodded, and I turned around, hating the way it made me hurt.
As I left his office, I was left to grapple with the turmoil within me, aching for the reassurance and understanding that seemed so far beyond my reach.
***
I scrolled through the latest memes Ethan had sent me when I heard footsteps coming down the hall. I sighed, knowing without a doubt it was Alexander.
I tapped out a quick shoutedLOLto Ethan, feeling a little guilty that I hadn’t told him that Alexander and I had both slept together and had a falling out. I had been dodging his messages a little. It made me miss home even more. It was even worse because I was ignoring Mia, too.
The scent of Alexander’s cologne floated on the air as he stepped into the suite, a potent reminder of our once fiery connection. The aroma sent a shiver down my spine, teasing me with memories of tangled limbs and heated breaths. My senses sharpened, but the doubts that had taken root within me refused to be silenced.
“Olivia,” Alexander said, leaning against the counter with a cup of coffee in his hand. His eyes were warm and inviting, but I couldn’t shake the feeling that they hid something darker beneath the surface. “I think we need to talk.”
I shook my head. “I told you I wasn’t feeling well.” I didn’t even look up at him.
“You’ve been avoiding me,” his voice deepened, his anger clear.
“No, I’ve been busy,” I replied curtly, keeping my gaze focused on the ceiling above me. The pretense allowed me to avoid the intensity of his stare, but did little to quiet the turmoil brewing inside me. “Lots of work to get done, you know.”
“Of course,” he said, taking a sip of his coffee. “But I was hoping we could talk, maybe clear the air between us. Things have been… strained lately.”
“Everything’s fine, Alexander,” I lied, my voice tight as I forced a smile onto my lips. The weight of his concern threatened to crush me, but I refused to allow him any closer. The uncertainty that plagued me was a barrier I wasn’t ready to dismantle. “I’m just swamped, that’s all.”
I didn’t tell him that there was nothing he could say to change my mind. I meant what I said. We couldn’t work. This was as close as we could ever be.
“All right,” he conceded, though I could tell he didn’t quite believe me. “But when you’re ready to talk, you know I’m here.”
“Thanks,” I mumbled, throwing an arm over my face.
I heard him heave a sigh, and then his shoes clicked across the floor until the bedroom door shut softly behind him. I knew he was showering, and the thought would have once sent a thrill through me. Now it just created an ache.
I ignored him when he ordered dinner and when he went to bed. And that night, I slept alone on the couch, finding it far more bearable than sharing the bed with him.
***
The hum of the office was a steady drone around me, but my thoughts were far from the work that I had been brought there for. My fingers hovered over the keyboard, tapping out an erratic rhythm that mirrored the dissonant symphony of emotions playing within me.
“Olivia,” Natalie, their marketing manager who had been generous enough to let me set up in her office all morning, interrupted my thoughts with her gentle voice. “Are you alright? You seem… distracted.”
“Sorry, Natalie,” I responded, trying to shake off the fog that had settled over me since last night’s encounter with Alexander. “I’ve just got a lot on my mind.”
“Let’s grab lunch together,” she suggested. “We can talk about it if you’d like.”
“Sure,” I agreed, grateful for the opportunity to unburden myself, even if only a little.
As we settled into our seats at a nearby cafe, the aroma of fresh coffee and warm bread enveloping us, I struggled to find the words to express the tangled knot of emotions that had taken root in my chest.
Natalie broke the quiet first. “What’s up?”
