AllFreeNovel
Share Us
CHAPTER ONE
Casey Islip held her mother’s hand, rubbing the boney fingers between her warm palms. Once upon a time, her mother’s hand swallowed her own. Now, it was as if Casey had grown to be twice her mother’s size.
Her breathing was short and labored as she struggled taking what would surely be her last breaths. The beeping and buzz of the machines made her skin crawl, but not nearly as much as the smell of alcohol and bleach. That’s what really made her sick.
“Mama, I’m here,” she whispered. “I’m here for you. It’s all okay.” Her mother shook her head, barely moving.
“Go,” whispered. “Go find your life.”
“You’re my life, Mama. I’m going to take care of you. Once the doctor says it’s okay, I’m going to take you home, and we’ll be together again. Just you and me. Peas and carrots.”
“No. Go fulfill your dreams. Find your father and learn to build a life with him. I know that he loves you.”
“He abandoned me, Mama. He abandoned us! I don’t want to find him.” She brushed away the tears on her cheeks, shaking her head.
“Listen to me, Casey,” she wheezed. “We were good for one another, but things happened that we couldn’t foresee. Your father adores you, but we knew that he had to leave at least for a while. We both knew that. Your father wasn’t making any money here in Evanston. H-he couldn’t find work here. He had to leave. You must understand that. Once he was settled, he would send checks for you.”
“Checks,” she grimaced, biting her lower lip. She didn’t want her last conversation with her mother to be an argument, but her mother’s ideas about her father were warped in Casey’s opinion.
“Sure, Mama. He sent checks. Now and then. He sent birthday gifts, when he remembered. I got a Christmas present from him, four, no five times in eighteen years. That’s got to be a record, right?”
“Casey,” she whispered, shaking her head. “Don’t, baby. You don’t understand. I should have explained it. Now, there’s no time. No more time. I’m sorry.”
“No, Mama. I’m not going to find him. I’m not going to forgive him. He didn’t want anything to do with me.”
“It wasn’t that, Casey. He wanted everything to do with you. He wanted to be around you, near you, beside you. It wasn’t you.” Her mother coughed, turning on her side as she covered her mouth with the tissue. The crimson and pink color told Casey that she had to let this go.
“Mama, let me call the doctor,” she said, standing from beside the bed.
“No. No,” she said, shaking her head. “I’m done with this. I’m done with fighting. I’m done with the coughing and the surgeries and the pain. I’m done. It’s my time, Casey. Let me go. But please. Please find your father. You’ll need him. You’ll need one another.”
“I’m getting the nurse,” she said, heading toward the door.
Marie Islip watched her daughter leave the room, her long black hair hanging down her back in a braid. She was her one accomplishment. Her one thing that she could take pride in and say, I did that. Or at least, I helped to do that.
But she had to make it right with her father. She had to. Carefully taking the envelope out of the pages of her bible, she held it tightly to her chest, then felt the sudden clenching of her lungs. She started to reach for the aid button, then just closed her eyes. A long, ragged breath left her body as she prayed for peace to finally be hers to take, finally no more pain, no more coughing.
“She’s just not doing well. We have to do something else,” said Casey to the nurse and doctor.
“Miss Islip, we’ve explained that your mother’s lung disease has progressed beyond any help,” said the doctor.
“Dr. Morgan?” The nurse nodded toward the bed, staring at the woman. Her heart rate monitor was beeping slower and slower and slower until it was a completely flat line.
“Mama? Mama!”
Why did it always seem to rain on days when people were buried? It rained when her grandparents were buried. It rained when her neighbor was buried. Now, it was raining cats and dogs on the day her mother would be buried. Her mother had been stubborn, not allowing her to call for help sooner. She might have lived. She might have survived at least a little longer. Medical breakthroughs were happening all the time. Maybe, just maybe, she could have been the recipient of one such breakthrough. If only.
Alone in the back of the sleek black car, she opened the letter that her mother had been clutching to her chest as she passed. It was from her father.
My darling Marie,
Oh, how I’ve missed your beautiful smile, your soft skin, and the unconditional love you gave to all who knew you. This is not the life we planned, is it, my love? We both knew this would be the safest way for you. I’m sorry to hear of your cough. Hopefully, it will be better after the antibiotics. It’s not something you should fool around with. I’m sending another check next week, hoping that this will get you whatever treatments you need.
I can’t thank you enough for the pictures of my sweet Casey. She is stunning, like her mother, and I’m sure just as brilliant. She’s turning into quite a beautiful young lady. I’ve enclosed a small check for now that should help the two of you. Maybe one day, she will understand why we had to live apart from one another. I just wasn’t willing to risk your life and hers.
Until we meet again, my love.
Your ever-faithful husband
