Page 39 of Cooked


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Cattle, swine, chickens, all of it, would not be able to reproduce at a rate large enough to sustain all human life. One day, there would have to be an alternative. But using manure and human components couldn’t be the way. The astounding number of problems associated with that theory boggled their minds.

If the theory related to the missing passengers on the bus were true, and RMN was using humans to fulfill their food packages, everything was going to screech to a halt when they were exposed.

Listen to me,”said Code in their ears.“I’m going to tap you into the underground lab that George and Teddy found. The brothers are having a bit of an argument.”

“What the hell happened?” growled Alex.

“I don’t know what you mean,” said a woman.

“You were supposed to put the discs inside the other crates. Instead, the one fucking place we get to try our product has crates full of maggots. How the fuck did that happen?” They heard a loud slap and then a gasp from a female.

“That’s not necessary, Martin,” said a woman. “Older brother doesn’t mean you get to bully. Cut your shit out. We put them in the right crates. Someone must have seen us placing them and followed, taking them out. No one had any issues last night except the sports bar.”

“No. They would have had to have known what we were doing. They knew what the discs were. Who? Who would have known that?”

“How would we know?” yelled the woman. “You keep us in this shithole working day and night while you two are out there as the faces of the company. We’re part of this too, Martin. It’s time you let us use some of our ideas. You’re not the only ones who can think up great concepts.”

“Fine, you two can figure out who in the fuck removed the discs from the baskets. We also need to know how they found out about the cameras. We’ve lost all of them! Not just one or two. All! I need you to find out who in the hell is screwing with our operation. And do it before Saturday,” said Alex.

“Alex, we can’t do it in three days! You’re so ridiculous! You’ve wasted our entire inheritance on this bullshit, and you can’t even make it work.”

“We’ll make it work, but you have to do your part and stop being lazy bitches.” They heard a slap and then someone laughing. “Nice shot, Peg. It’s the last one you’ll get. Sister or no, I’ll fucking kill you if you touch me again.”

“Go to hell, Alex. I’m done with this shit. I should have taken my part of the money and left after Mom and Dad died. You always were a piece of shit as a brother. Stands to reason you’re making shit now.”

“Me too,” said another female.

“You two walk away, you lose everything!”

“Not everything,” said the other woman. “We were smart enough to reserve some of our inheritance for a rainy day. You’re on your own, assholes. Mom was right. You’re a couple of deadbeat dreamers.”

“Fuck off, Tonia. We don’t need you!” They could hear doors slamming, then the brothers whispering among themselves again.

“We don’t need them,” said Martin. “They’ve been slowing us down. We needed their money, and they gave it to us. When we succeed, we’ll pay them back. We need to see what those new scientists are doing. Then we need to pay a little trip to Islip’s daughter.”

Back upstairs, the team wrote out formula after formula, hoping that neither of the brothers had the brain power to figure out what they were doing. They stared at the three people whispering and working, writing complex formulations on their whiteboard.

“Did you figure it out?” asked Alex.

“Oh, no, sir, not yet,” said Suzette. “We think your last team wasn’t working with the right data. You’re attempting to transform manure and human components into edible materials, correct?”

The brothers stared at the three, shocked that they’d figured everything out. They stared from one to the other.

“You hired us because we know what we’re doing,” said Miller. “Didn’t you think we’d figure this out?”

“Well, it’s not that exactly. It’s just…” Alex stammered, and his brother stepped forward.

“It’s just that we can’t let anyone know. Not yet. You understand we have to keep all of this confidential.” Miller grinned at him, nodding.

“I understand. People would really freak out if they knew you were trying to feed them cow shit and human components.” Alex and Martin swallowed, staring at the big man.

“Exactly.”

“Cool,” nodded Miller. “Let us get back to work.” Miller just glared at the two men, daring them to say anything to any of them.

“It’s almost four,” said Alex. “Why don’t you three go ahead and leave? We’ve got some business to take care of in the city anyway.”

Suzette and Riley removed their lab jackets, placing them on the back of their chairs. Miller wasn’t wearing a lab coat, having not been able to find one to fit over his arms. He stacked the data in a pile, turned off the computer and other machines, and gave a curt nod to the brothers.

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