AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Unable to move, I watch as he slowly puts his clothes back on. His shirt is sticking to his damp chest. Once he’s finished dressing, he helps me up to a sitting position. With a sigh, he pulls my skirt down over my knees. It’s only as he’s fastened my bra and helped me into my blouse that I ask.
“Do… you don’t think I could get pregnant… my first time, do you?”
He lifts an eyebrow. “Would it be so bad if you did?”
“Aidan!”
“Imagine what Father Murray would say if you had a growing belly –unmarried.”
I gasp at his words, the shock of the image he’s painting, and a giggle finds its way up my throat. Why is this image so appealing? “He would claim doomsday was imminent.”
“We’ll be more careful in the future,” he says, smiling. “I’ll pull out.”
“There will be more times?”
“Yes. This summer, I’ll train you to find your way of holding your head high when your parents make you feel insignificant.”
My heart swells and I hope he can see the gratitude in my smile. “You are a very generous man…Daddy.”
19
Caitlin
“Forgive me Father, for I have sinned.”
Oh, have I ever, I giggle quietly to myself, not hearing a word of Father Murray’s preaching through the partition.
20
Caitlin
I do a Hail Mary against my thigh, hidden in the folds of my dress. I shouldn’t think evil thoughts. I have enough sins to carry at the moment, but Uncle Edward makes it difficult to have a pure heart.
“Tobias has taken over the running of the stud farm. Heis,after all, the heir of the estate.”
“Fin is now part owner of the company,” Dad counters and puffs his chest out while mine caves in. The crystal sparkles in the sun as he waves his champagne flute in front of him. “He’s designed a new range and is about to run his first campaign. Quite impressive for his age.”
I lower my head. No mention of me. I’m also part owner. And I’m designing my own jewellery, not copying someone else’s. I resent Dad for favouring Fin, but I know it stems from this exact conversation. Mum’s brother has always looked down on Dad, always belittled him and shoved his perfect family in Dad’s face. Especially Tobias,the heir of the estate, with his Cambridge University degree and posh, rich friends. Dad tries to show Uncle Edward up by moulding and guiding Fin to takeover the company ashisheir.
I sigh quietly and try to block out their conversation as I let my gaze drift over the church courtyard. It could be a celebrity wedding with its lavish decoration, people dressed up and fancy food and drink. Poor Niamh cried seeing the cat was missing from the sign, but her toothless smile was back when I handed her three cat paintings that I had prepared for her, telling her she could take those home and hang them up in her room.
I used to enjoy these types of charity events when I was younger, used to love listening to the older generation’s tales about what it was like back in the day, and they loved to have an audience for their stories. I think a couple of old gangsters used to tell fibs, taking great enjoyment in making me believe their outrageous adventures. Now, Mum insists I stay with her. It’s not appropriate for me to sit and chat to old men and women. I need to show off a more mature side of myself, she says. Mingle. Which in practice means I’m stuck to her side, listening to boring adult talk that I have no interest in. No wonder I have a tendency to daydream. And I have so much to dream about these days…
“Well, Caitlin, sweetheart.” Aunt Elizabeth rips me out of my thoughts. I place a polite smile on my face. “You’re at quite some age now. Any agreeable suitors on the horizon?”
“Um, oh no. Uh, I’d like to finish school first.”
“Education is good and all, butTheresawas engaged at your age.”Don’t we all know it.“And she doesn’t need a degree when she’s running such a big household. Although she does part-time courses studying history of art – she can’t have a house full of antiques and not appreciate their value!” Aunt Elizabeth gaffs the way only posh English people can pull off with her nose in the air and her champagneflute close to her lips.
“Theresa is so accomplished,” Mum praises, but a frown is dulling her eyes. She never liked her posh English sister-in-law, for the same reason Dad doesn’t like Uncle Edward. “I keep telling Caitlin she needs to follow her cousin’s example.”
Perfect and poised Theresa, engaged at nineteen to an English viscount, married in the most lavish of ceremonies at twenty. Mother of two by twenty-three. I sigh quietly. That’s apparently my destiny as well if my parents have anything to say about it.
“Oh, well…”
I tune Aunt Elizabeth out as she goes on and on aboutsaintTheresa, only intercepted by Uncle Edward’s gloating about Tobias. I wonder if Theresa is happy. She sure appears to be whenever we meet, which isn’t often as she’s busy with her viscountess duties. I don’t think Theresa has ever asked me a question in her life, only talking about herself. But maybe she’s good at hiding her emotions, just like me?
“Straighten your back, Caitlin,” Mum hisses next to me. “You’ll never get a suitable husband if you slouch like that. And try to at leastseeminterested, your daydreaming is not appealing to anyone.”
