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His jaw grinds down. I am being insolent right now.
I should stop.
We’re actually friendly—no, friends. Real ones. And I know why he has a hard time attaching himself to people after what he's been through, but I can’t stop. I want to push hard, fast, rudely… until he admits how he feels. Not delivered as a whisper when we are almost sleeping, or a begrudging “I care” statement that can be construed as obligatory duty. No, I want to yank more from him.Care for me. Break for me. Admit more.
I get off the bed, go on my knees and rummage through my luggage for a few moments before pulling out my sleep shorts and a tank top. I stand and lay them out on the comforter. I’m not looking to see if he is watching, but the way my skin prickles assures me he is. He watches every move I make. He always does.
“What are you going to do after quitting?” I ask. “I guess you’ll find another Pollywood star to look after. Someone pliant. If you are lucky, someone polite and respectful of your authority.”
I unbutton my pants and pull the zipper down.
The rasp is loud. It's a lewd declaration making my heart pound harder. I hold on to the top of my pants, not pushing them down yet. My fingers may or may not be trembling.
“Whatever you are doing, stop.” Huan’s voice pulls me out of my head. “If you go further, there will be consequences, Ms. Chahal.”
I shake my head, half in wonder at how theRight Kind of Evilthis feels. As if I know it’s making him insane and destroying the control levers he keeps wound up tight. What else to do but take off my shirt? With that, I’m left only in a lace bra and pants. I drop the shirt to the ground when Huan lunges at me.
I shift to evade him, but he’s quick. He closes his palm around my wrist and pulls me against him. I try to wrestle, but my arms are pinned. When he leans over, his breath is warm against my neck. Squealing, I kick up, my legs trying to wrench myself free, but to no avail.
Huan lifts me, walks my writhing body to the bed, and lays me down without letting go. There’s no opportunity to kick him in the groin because it’s a risk he mitigates by straddling my body and sitting on my hips. I buckle, but it does nothing. Huan has immobilized me. He’s got so much weight and strength on me it’s ridiculous. And now his face is above mine, shadowing me, inches apart.
I stop fighting with my body. No use in doing that.
Instead, my mouth smirks. “I’ll have to find another bodyguard. Have any recommendations? I’ve got a thing for men who are stoic on the outside but have all these horny desires on the inside. Then again, I’m sure I can adapt to a new cock.Loveme a new cock. Yum, yum.”
I expect that to piss him off, but to my complete shock, he laughs.
He bends enough so his mouth goes near my ear. “You really let yourself out, didn’t you?”
“Yeah, so? You’ve been telling me it’s okay to do that, so I finally did. What? Am I not to your liking?”
Growing hardness against my body is large evidence to the contrary. Huan might evade, but that part of him can't. It's hot and heavily bringing itself to my attention. My chest heaves in pleasure, and that plumps up my breasts higher.
“Fuck—” His eyes roam over them. Yellow lace against beautiful brown skin, the semi-transparent cups pushing my curves up. Huan tilts his head down, as if trying to compose himself but failing. “Fuck!”
“Am I not to your liking?” I ask again.
He slowly cups my cheek, a tendril of his hair going over his forehead. “Liking? This assignment is a long torture session. Being around you is driving me insane—I can’t think—about anything but you.”
The way his thumb caresses my jaw is gentle and very different from the rigid lines of the rest of his body. “First you were the job. Only a job. Then I started noticing little things, and I tried to find the pattern. Only a game. To understand the client better so I can protect them, I told myself. Let me guess what it means when her fingers curl up, but she smiles, or I’ll catch her expression when she walks away from a conversation and thinks no one can see her. Why does her laugh sound different when she gets a private message from her friends but doesn’t sound the same in public?” He shakes his head. “But London has ruined me. If I had known everything I would see and learn about you—I would haveneveragreed to come. Because I can’t do my job around you. Not when my brain is on this loop, wondering about your feelings. Is she happy? What can I do to make her happy? Should I search up some adventures?What kind of adventures?” He scowls so severely. “You.” A sharp accusation. “I’m measuring my day withyou.”
His eyes drag down to my chest.
“Not to mention—You don’t want to know what I have to think to not be hard around you all the fucking time.”
“You want me,” I say, rather inadequately as a summary of everything he has admitted.
Huan shakes his head. “I want you despite all my efforts to not want you.”
What efforts? Screw those efforts, the cantankerous part of me cries out.
“Do you think this ends when you leave?” I accuse. “It won’t. We haven’t done enough to kill it! We have not touchedenough, Huan. This will grow and eat us alive even when we don’t see each other and I—I can’t be dying over you. If you leave now, we’ll replay this night in our heads until we hate each other.” My voice breaks. “I don’t want to hate you. I can’t.”
I lift up enough to kiss his mouth, a hesitant brush, surprised he lets me. “Stay,” I breathe.
It’s not a plea or an order. I’m not sure what it is, only the trickiness and pokiness of wanting a reaction is gone. This is my laid-bare desire. He can do whatever he wants with it.
Huan pauses, and then slowly kisses me back, his mouth exploring my lips. It’s hungry and shaky for both of us. When he pulls back to stare at me, more words blurt out of me.
