Page 59 of Notorious


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I’m so confused right now.

I know there’s more he isn’t telling me, and I have never been one to push him about this stuff, but after seeingthatstrange reaction, and the talk we just had, I’m sure as shit not about topush.

Standing, I walk up behind him, placing my hand on his back for comfort. He doesn’t fight me off like moments before.

Clearing his throat, he shakes his head. “I can’t lose that pig, Haven.”

Furrowing my brow, I slide my arm around his waist, holding onto him. “I don’t understand. Is it all the pigs you are deeply connected to or just Fajita?”

He slowly turns to look at me, and if I’m not mistaken, his eyes show a deep, harrowing grief. “Just Fajita.”

Nodding, I glance at the stuffed pig in his hands and then back up to where he’s pulled it from to see some little pink baby booties. My brows furrow, and I tense up, my throat clearing from the heavy knot that’s formed inside.

There’s something big he’s been keeping from me.

And seeing that he’s been so open with me, I’m going to try and see if we can keep this going. “Alpha… why did you and Livvy break up?”

He inhales sharply. It’s only minor, but I see his bottom lip tremble for a second, the sight tearing at my heart like a hot knife slicing right through it to the other side.

Oh shit! I’m in deep trouble.

But right now, I don’t even care that I’m clearly too attached to him.

I step forward, reach out, and pull him to me in a tight embrace. His arms slide around my body, holding me to him so fucking tight, his nose burying into my hair. “It’s okay. You don’t have to tell me,” I whisper.

His hands slide up and down my back as he holds tight, not letting me go. In this severe moment of grief for him, allIfeel is betrayal. My betrayal!Guilt swarms through me that I am letting him trust me, that I am tricking him into believing that I am some kind of good person when I am anything but. “I want totell you. I’m concerned about what you’ll think when I do.”

Pulling back but still locked in his arms, I look into his eyes, my heart telling me I should walk away.Right now.Just get the fuck out before you hurt him any more than you’re already going to when he finds out who you really are.

But that would make this moment about me.

Right now, he needs me.

He needs Haven, not Blue Jay, who is freaking the hell out about her mission.

“Alpha, nothing is going to change how I feel about you. I just want to know everything about you.”

His hand comes up, gently caressing a strand of hair away from my face, his eyes meeting mine. “I never thought I would meet anyone like you. Someone who could be understanding of all my flaws.”

“And you have so,somany.” I snort out a laugh.

He narrows his eyes on me. “I’m being serious, Haven.”

My hand comes up, scrunching his hair between my fingers. “I know, I’m sorry. Just know whatever happened with you and Livvy, it’s okay to discuss it with me. I won’t judge you. I think you know by now that I am pretty easygoing. It’s gonna take a hell of a lot to push me away from you.”

He leans his forehead against mine and exhales. “Livvy and I had a daughter.”

My eyes widen at the word ‘had,’ and I chew on my bottom lip. “What happened?”

He grimaces and turns away to begin his typical pacing.

“Rico Rojas and his cartel took her to get back at me. I found her body. After that, Livvy blamed me for our daughter’s death. Said if it wasn’t for the club, Poppy wouldn’t be dead. Livvy left, and we got a divorce.”

My heart sinks for him and everything he has gone through in his life. “I’m so sorry that happened to you both.” He weaklysmiles. “But, what does Fajita have to do with all this?”

He grabs the stuffed toy pig, a slow smile crossing his face. “Poppy adored Fajita. I don’t know what it was about that pig, but those two were inseparable.”

The realization hits me. “Losing Fajita would be like losing a part of Poppy,” I clarify what he is saying without having to say it.

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