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“And I love you,” she interrupted. “It’s not so hard.”
“But it is.” He took a deep breath. “Your parents will never approve of me. And I’ll never be rich enough to give you the life you’re used to?—”
“In case you haven’t noticed, I live in a little, run-down apartment. I’d hardly say I’m used to much.”
“The way you grew up, in that house?—”
“That prison.”
“I’d never be able to give it to you.”
“Who said I even wanted a life like that?” He paused at the words. She hadn’t ever said it, hadn’t ever even implied it, but…
But that’s what Mandy had wanted. Money. Fuck, sometimes even he wanted it. But he was fine with a subpar house, subpar car, subpar life for himself. But for Abbie? She deserved so much more.
“Who said I want to live in a sterile home? Or hire people to clean for me, or have a million cars that cost way too much, or—” She cut herself off with a deep breath. “I don’t want any of that. I just want to paint. And I want you. That’s it. That’s all I want in life.”
He let her words sink in. He guessed he’d never truly asked her before, and hearing her words eased something inside him. But doubts still played in his mind. What if she changed her mind one day?
“Just…” her voice broke as she trailed off. “Just don’t say no yet, okay? Promise me you’ll think about what I said, not what you think I’ll want. I know you want what’s best for me, but you’re what’s best.”
How could she say that when she didn’t even know the whole truth? When she didn’t know what all he’d done?
“You don’t know everything,” he rasped. “And after you do, you won’t want anything to do with me.”
“Why don’t you let me decide that?” she said softly. “Tell me tomorrow, when you’re home.”
Yeah, he thought that was probably a good idea too. That way he could read her face and know if she was lying or not. Even though he didn’t want to have this conversation, it was for the best.
“Okay,” he said, his voice raspy. “Tomorrow.”
thirty-five
The wooden porch creaked as she paced back and forth, her hands twisting together in front of her. She hadn’t been able to sleep last night, too anxious about seeing Jett today, so she decided to come to his house as soon as she saw the first slivers of the sun.
Abbie had been too nervous to call or text him, so she’d just stared at her phone all day, waiting for him to call first. He never did. But with the sun high overhead, she was starting to wonder if he wasn’t coming home today after all. He’d have to come home eventually, and when he did, she’d be on this porch waiting for him, but when would that be?
Gravel crunched and she whirled around, her hands reaching out for the banister to steady herself. She stared at his truck as he crept toward the house, and even though she couldn’t see his face through the tinted window, she imagined him with a stoney expression, like he usually had when he drove.
His truck stopped in the driveway, right behind her little car. She felt like she was going to throw up, and she pressed her hands into her belly. She could feel his eyes on her, staring at her, watching her. No matter how much she wanted to run to him, she couldn’t move. Her legs didn’t seem to work anymore.
The front door swung open, and a long leg appeared, his booted foot landing heavily on the ground. Then the other came into view, then he was there, standing at his full height, his broad shoulders straight and shirt tight across his biceps and chest.
God, she’d missed him.
She shuffled forward a small step, the banister still guarding her from taking off in a full sprint to him. She just wanted to be wrapped up in his arms, wanted to feel his lips against hers, feel his body slide against hers.
He hesitated, still standing beside his truck. They stared at each other, the air thick between them. Then he started moving.
Each step was quicker than the last, like he couldn’t contain himself as he hurried across the lawn to her. He stopped in front of her, his hands at his sides, his chest heaving. Her head tipped all the way back, and finally, their eyes met.
“Hi,” she breathed, and he let out a long breath, his lips barely tipping up in a smile.
“Hi,” he said. She wanted to touch him, but would wait until he made the first move. “You’re here already.”
“I missed you!” she wanted to scream at him, but she twisted her lips to the side instead, trying to keep the words in.
“You wanna come in?” He awkwardly threw his thumb over his shoulder toward the front door and she nodded eagerly. He stayed staring at her for another long moment before he turned and unlocked the front door, shoving it open and stepping aside so she could enter first.
