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She’d lie awake in bed, listening to his footfalls against the polished boards, holding her breath as he passed her room, the small, traitorous part of her she refused to acknowledge wishing he’d enter on some flimsy excuse.
Pathetic.
Considering she’d been the one to reinforce the ‘just friends’ mantra when she moved in, it was rather ironic she was having the most difficulty sticking to it.
She’d see him first thing in the morning, his jaw covered in stubble, and want to caress his cheek. She’d smell him fresh out of the shower when he left a fragrant cloud of steam in his wake as she walked past the bathroom door and willed herself not to inhale deep lungfuls of the heady stuff. She’d hear him humming as he got dressed and tried to blot out the vivid mental image that sprung to mind of what he looked like without clothes.
Shaking her head, she stuffed a handful of popcorn in her mouth and hit play on the remote. She needed to chill out with this romcom, have a few laughs, and forget about Blane for two hours.
However, like most of her plans these days, they didn’t run smoothly, and as the opening credits rolled onto the screen, she heard the front door swing open.
“Hey, there. What are you watching?”
Her heart galloped as Blane plopped onto the couch beside her, looking wind-tossed and deliciously dishevelled in his rumpled tan T-shirt and faded denim, resident smile in place.
“Some girly movie Anna recommended to me about three years ago.”
He laughed. “Don’t get much time to watch movies, huh?”
“Try never.”
“Mind if I watch it with you?”
Great. She’d look like a churlish cow if she refused, but what happened to her Blane-free time? Not only would she be forced to sit through one hundred and twenty minutes of having him less than three feet away, she could actually smell him, the faintest waft of cedar instantly transporting her back to a time she shouldn’t be remembering let alone craving.
“What are you thinking?”
Her gaze flew to his, her breath catching at the tenderness she glimpsed, and while it would be smarter to fob him off, she was too caught up in the moment to lie.
“Remember that old cedar tree?”
His eyes crinkled, his smile warm. “The one with the old tyre? Sure. You used to love ordering me around like some lowly serf to push you for ages.”
She chuckled at the memory, catapulted back to a time when they had nothing better to do than tease each other, laugh with each other, secure in their love.
What she wouldn’t give to step back in time.
Without the messy ending and the new complications.
“There were times you used to order me around, like when we used to walk miles through the National Park on the outskirts of town.”
“Yeah.” His eyes twinkled with amusement. “Though you made me haul a ten ton picnic on my back every time.”
“That’s because you were always starving.”
The minute the words popped out of her mouth, his eyes darkened to smoky grey and she knew in an instant he was thinking of other appetites beside food.
“Speaking of being starving, here, have some popcorn.”
She shoved the bowl toward him, not surprised her hand trembled. He had that effect on her, always had, and sheclamped her lips together to refrain from saying anything else she might regret.
“Thanks.”
He grabbed a handful, tossed a few kernels in the air, tilted his head back, and caught them as they dropped into his open mouth like he’d always done, and once again, she was transported back in time, to the weekly movie sessions at the town hall where they’d sit in the back row, holding hands so tightly her fingers would tingle, her head resting on his shoulder, snuggling into his warmth.
Those had been good times, and for those magical three months he’d held her spellbound, caught up in a whirlwind of passion and laughter and friendship the likes of which she’d never known.
But Blane had left, leaving a gaping hole in her life, a soul-deep emptiness that haunted her to this day despite moving on, and while she’d accepted his rationale for leaving, it didn’t mean she had a desire to go back there again.
