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His serious tone catches me off guard. I almost feel bad for him for a moment. Almost.
“I like him.”
I go to turn around, but he taps my arm to stop me. “You can have anyone you want. Just pick someone else.”
“Exactly. And I want Mack,” I say as I go to leave.
“He likes you too.”
His words stop me in my tracks as I glance back at him again, curiosity piquing. “What?”
He scrunches his face up like he’s annoyed. “Yeah, yeah. It was all love at first sight. He gushed like a baby the night you met. So like I said before, he can’t do casual with you, so pick someone else.”
“At first sight?”
“Huh?” He shakes his head, confused.
“He told you the night we met? About me?” I stand taller, invading his space.
He pulls at his collar like he can’t get enough air. “Yeah, uh… we’re twins. We tell each other everything.”
I lower my voice, afraid if I don’t, I’m going to start shouting. “He told you the story? About the kiss? The. Night. We. Met?”
The guilt is written all over his face. He steps back like he’s afraid of me, assuming a defensive position. “Addison,” he warns.
It’s too late. I can already feel the crazy coming out.
It’s the laughter. The laughter that’s coming out of my mouth right now even through all I feel is rage. If I heard someone laugh like me, I’d run too. He should be afraid. Very, very fucking afraid.
“I gave you the benefit of the doubt, you know.” I begin pacing the room, trying to expel some of this energy. “I thought to myself, hmm… maybe I’m being too hard on Declan. Maybe he really didn’t make the connection that the guy I kissed could have been his actual clone. That maybe you were too caught off guard to think that intelligently.” I ball my hands into fists. “Oh no! Fuck no! You knew the whole story!” I walk back up to him, getting in his face again. “You knew about the trolley the whole time, and yet you still led me to believe I was the crazy one! You made me question myself!” I open my mouth to say the next words, but I pause for a moment, trying to gather my thoughts. My eyes lock with his. “You. Still. Fucking. Kissed. Me.”
He doesn’t look away, owning up to it completely. His intensity scares me. A ghost of a smile appears on his lips as his eyes fall down to my mouth.
He leans in closer, lowering his voice to a whisper. “I’d do it again.”
My breath catches as his eyes flick back up to mine, his face only inches away from me. My heartbeat falls into rhythm with our mingled breath as I scan his face, ending back at the place I started. His lips.
Sound fades away as my heartbeat throbs in my ears. That drop in my stomach, the way my heart races, the excitement, the anticipation, I know what it is. I don’t feel anything for him. I don’t even really want him to kiss me.
No. That’s not what this is.
It’s the attention. The absolute need I have for some type of affection right now. It’s the way my heart is hurting so fucking bad that I just want someone to want me. I want someone to see me. I just need the pain to stop. For a minute. For a moment.
Relief.
I clear my throat, stepping away from him. “I have to get back to work. I still need to pull last quarter’s invoices for the trial audit you’re making us do.”
“Addison,” he says, attempting to reach for me as I walk back toward the door.
“Don’t.” I stop him, bolting out of there before he can say anything else. I raise my shoulders and blow out a breath. What the hell was that?
I plop down in my chair and wheel it back to my desk. I stare at my computer screen, mindlessly looking at my email but unable to move.
I hear his footsteps, but I feel his presence. I know he’s there before he speaks.
“I’m not going to let this happen. I promise you that.”
“You don’t have a say in the matter.”
