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Oblivious to my mortification, Lee answers Jack with, “Top drawer of my vanity.”
“Lee in there?” Jamie appears in my doorway, entirely naked. A towel is slung over his shoulder. “Have you used my trimmers? I’ve just gone to find them, but they’re not in my cabinet.”
My hand flies up to avert my gaze, but it’s too late. The image of Jamie Jr. is burnt on my retinas.
Barely a week in and already my father’s worst nightmares are coming true.
“Go on, darling. Have a gander,” Jamie says with humor in his voice. “Surely you’ve seen a knob before.”
“Oh,” I say, coughing a laugh. “Isn’t that quaint.”
Jack keels over with laughter. “Oh no, mate. She called it quaint.”
“I think she meant the euphemism.”
“No, she’s said your willy’s sweet and delicate like Grandma’s knitting.”
Truthfully, my experience with a penis by any name is limited to a one-night stand in high school and a guy freshman year I could generously call my boyfriend. The sex was good, but neither of us were devastated when we moved on.
“Yeah, so can I have my room back now?” I ask, arms strategically placed, talking to the floor.
“Right, you lot.” Lee corrals the boys away from the door with arms out wide. “Time for a house meeting about knocking first.”
Relief trickles over me once they’re gone, and I allow my hands to drop to my sides. Cohabitation will take some getting used to.
And door locks.
We catch a ride to the pub, which is itself a fraught ordeal. Lee seizes the front seat and leaves me sandwiched in the back between Jack, Jamie, and Jamie’s penis. But it’s Jack, with his sculpted arms and muscular legs pressed against mine, that has me running warm. Both from embarrassment and nervousness.
Like a scratchy throat warning of a coming cold, I feel the fizz of a budding crush bubbling in my gut. He looks utterly edible in a pair of faded jeans and a T-shirt with a surf logo stretched across his broad chest. And he smells really good. So good I have to force myself not to breathe because I’m worried I’ll sigh dreamily each time I inhale.
Except not breathing isn’t conducive to staying alive, so before long, I’m forced to suck in an abrupt gulp of air. Which makes me cough for a few seconds and draws an amused look from Jack.
Check her out, folks. The weirdo American who hasn’t figured out oxygen.
I’m practically jumping out of my skin by the time the driver pulls up at the curb. The moment I’m out of the car, I breathe in the fresh evening air and pretend I’m not at all affected by the hot Australian standing next to me.
Inside, the pub is crowded but not bursting. Most of the commotion surrounds the bar and dartboards toward the front of the room. We bypass them to the tables arranged in front of the tiny vacant platform just large enough to squeeze in a drum set, mics, amps, and a couple monitors.
Lee leads us to a table with two young women already seated. A pale willowy blond with a severe pixie cut sets down her martini when he walks up. She’s wearing a satiny dress with a deep vee neckline and a ton of funky silver jewelry. She lifts her large seafoam eyes to mine, and I’m already feeling small and underdressed.
Beside her, a taller girl stands to kiss Lee on both cheeks. This one wears a tight ribbed tee and leather pants that encase her endless legs. She’s gorgeous. Like easily the most attractive person I’ve ever seen in real life.
The similarities between her and Lee are impossible to miss. They have the same mouth. Same dark eyes and high cheekbones. They’re not identical, but you’d know these two were related from across the room.
“My twin, Celeste,” Lee says by way of an introduction. “Cece, this is Abbey.”
“Ah. The American.”
I get that a lot lately. “One and the same,” I answer shyly. “It’s nice to finally meet you.”
“Likewise. This is Yvonne.” Celeste nods toward the elegant blond, then gives me the up and down.
While she examines me, I wonder if Lee’s assistance earlier helped or hindered. Both Yvonne and Celeste are dressed far more glamorously and sexier than anything I would have come up with. I suddenly feel like a little kid.
As Jack and Jamie run off to the bar, Yvonne rises to greet me with double air-kisses. I zig when I should zag and we end up in this awful dance trying to get out of each other’s way. She ends up kissing my ear, then my nose, and we are both worse for the entireexchange. At this point, I’d prefer to leave the country and never come back.
Her eyes flicker with amusement. “Right. That certainly was awkward.”
