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Audrey’s mouth opens and closes as she realizes she just fell into her own trap. I smirk as she scowls at me, and I feel contented happiness sweep through me. “I guess she can.”
“Can we play dolls after dinner?”
I go to answer as I check the timer on the oven, but Tia isn’t asking me, she’s gazing longingly at Audrey. I get it. Boy, do I get it. I feel the same look on my face when I look at her too.
Audrey looks to me for help and I nod. “Sure, but only if Audrey doesn’t mind and only if your homework is done.”
“Yay.”
Tia runs off, most likely to bring every doll she owns down into the lounge, and I’m left alone for the first time with the woman who owns my heart. My every instinct wants me to take her in my arms and erase every ounce of the exhaustion I see on her face, but I know I have to take this slow and not overwhelm her. “Would you like a glass of wine?”
“Yes, that would be lovely.”
She wipes her palm down her thigh, and I want to reassure her, but she turns her head away, moving as she takes in my space. I busy myself, pouring her a glass of her favorite white wine.
“I can give you the tour after dinner.” As I hand her the glass, our fingers brush, and that pull that’s always there when she’s near dances over my fingertips.
“Thank you. That would be nice.”
I lean against the island, marveling at the fact she is in my home.
“Aren’t you going to have a glass?”
I shake my head. “Not tonight. Tia has a bit of a cold, so I want to make sure I’m totally fine to drive unimpaired just in case.”
Audrey stops with the glass halfway to her luscious lips.“Is that likely? Is she okay?”
I offer her a grin as the timer goes off on the oven. I grab the oven glove and pull the still bubbling lasagna from the oven, placing it on a trivet to cool, while I dress a salad. It also gives me a chance to collect my thoughts.
“Tia had a few health issues when she was younger. Her heart mainly and it makes a simple cold take on a very different possibility for her. She’s mostly well. I just have to be vigilant.”
“Oh, I didn’t know.” Audrey shakes her head, placing the glass of wine on the side as if she lost her taste for it suddenly.
I hate that I’ve landed that weight on her delicate shoulders. “How could you?”
She looks up, her eyebrow arched. “Indeed.”
I chuckle at her statement, the slight dig about the secret I kept well-earned. “I deserve that.”
Audrey sighs. “No, you didn’t. I shouldn’t have said it.”
“You can ask me anything, Audrey, and I’ll answer you honestly. You have my word.”
She purses her lips as if thinking and then gives her head a tiny shake.“Let’s just have a nice dinner. I have dolls to play with and I think I might need all my mental fortitude for that.”
“Oh, you definitely will. Tia will have you playing all night. Believe me, I know.”
“You’re good with her.”
I glance at Tia as she walks back into the kitchen with her favorite doll under her arm and can’t help the wave of love I feel for her.“She makes it easy.”
Dinner is a relaxed, lively affair and I barely get a word in as Tia and Audrey chat away like they’ve known each other for years. I hadn’t really considered how the lack of a female figure, like Audrey, would affect Tia. While we have Mrs. Price, she’s older and struggles to do certain things. Tia is basking in Audrey’s infectious light and it’s crystal clear that Audrey feels the same.
Seeing this warm, gentle side of Audrey after feeling her hatred for so long, makes me desperately want to do the one thing I know I never can; turn back the clock. After dinner, I’m banished to the kitchen so that the girls can play. I can’t say I’m mad about it, not when it allows me the privilege of hearing so much laughter and joy coming from the den.
Standing with my shoulder against the door jamb, I cross my arms and watch Tia and Audrey together, and a longing for something so far out of reach it’s almost impossible hits me. This. I want this to be what I come home to every night. The two people who own different parts of my heart together making memories.
Audrey looks up as she cradles a doll in her arms and our eyes lock. So much is still unsaid, so much raw emotion still standing between us, but for the first time in a long time, I have hope that maybe one day I could have the unthinkable.
