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I want more than anything to reach out and pull her into my arms, but she isn’t mine and never will be.
3Audrey
My skin prickleswhere he touched me, and it takes everything in me not to show him how much he affects me. Standing in front of me like some Greek god, the picture of every fantasy I’d ever had come to life. The dips and curves of his muscled abdomen led to a fine sprinkling of dark hair. The V over his hips pointing down like an arrow to what awaits if I succumb to this wild attraction.
I hate how in control Hudson is as if this dire situation doesn’t affect him at all. Just another day in the life of Hudson fucking Carmichael and the proud, almost arrogant tilt of his chin as he watches me. I hate him and yet my eyes continue to dip, wanting to trace every line of his body with my hands, my lips. The distant memory of what we shared digging sharp claws into me and making me remember what we had. Until he broke us.
That thought alone helps snap me from this lust-filled fog. I can never forget. I carry the scars, both physical and mental, because of what he did. I harness that hurt like I always do and allow it to calm me in the face of the situation I find myself.
Having no memory of what happened should scare me, and it does, but what scares me more is that I might have slept with Hudson and have no memory of it. I own my mistakes and if I allowed Hudson to fuck me, I want to remember every delicious second of it. Every orgasm, every cry, and every flex of his body over mine. The direction of my thoughts makes me angry as I see the cocky smirk on his full lips.
I need to get away from this infuriating man before I do something even more stupid than drunk marrying him, and that’s to sober fuck him. Mustering up every ounce of the haughty, cutting person I’ve cultivated over the years, I glance at him, letting disgust curl my lip. “I’m going to take a shower. Can you please have some clothes brought up for me?”
Hudson arches a dark brow at my demand but says nothing, merely dipping his head. How can he be so calm, so controlled in the face of this public shitstorm? I walk away quickly, turning to drown out his addictive intensity. “And can you please put some damn clothes on?” I slam the door with a satisfying snap and hear his laughter on the other side. I lift my hand, wanting to throw something, anything, or scream but my phone in my hand rings, startling me out of my fury.
I groan as I glance at the screen.
Lincoln.
Damn, just what I didn’t need. I could let it go to voicemail but, as I already have fifteen missed calls, I decide I might as well get this over with. “Don’t start.” My defensive response is instinctive as I try to ward off what I know is coming.
“What the fuck, Audrey? You married that prick?”
My eyes roll up to the heavens at my cousin’s opening statement of the obvious. “Apparently so.”
“What the hell were you thinking?”
A huff leaves my lips at his question, and it’s one I wish I had the answer to. “Well, clearly I wasn’t fucking thinking, was I?”
My sharp retort is met with silence.
“Did he force you?”
My heart hammered in my chest at Lincoln’s question and, as much as I might hate the man on the other side of the door to me, I’d never let anyone think that of him. He was a lot of things, but he wasn’t a man who would force a woman. “Of course not. He’s an asshole, not a psychopath.”
“I just don’t want to see him hurt you again, Aud.”
My fingers tighten on the sink I’m leaning against, my shoulders relaxing a fraction from the release of tension. Linc was my cousin, but he was also the brother I’d never had. He protected me, and I him, and, when the past between us was woven with poison and pain, Lincoln was the only person who knew even a small part of it.
It was hard for a woman in my position to lean on others, to show weakness of any kind. I always had to be seen as harder, stronger, and less emotional than the men I faced, so showing a softer side was reserved strictly for those few I trusted. Lincoln’s words were a reminder that I’m not alone, that people had my back if I allowed it.
My voice softened as I responded.“I know, and I promise you he didn’t force anything. This was a drunken mistake, and I’ll fix it.”
“What do you need from me?”
So typical of my cousin to step up for me. Linc was a hard-faced asshole who didn’t show the world his soft side, but when you had his loyalty and love, you had it for life. He’d move heaven and earth for those he cared about.
My thoughts instantly turned to all the ways this news could damage my reputation. My job, my career, the years of working my ass off to garner the respect I deserved. Not because of my family name but because I was damn good at what I did. I knew Lincoln saw me for what I did for Kennedy Enterprises, but that wouldn’t stop the old guard from whispering and plotting.
“Can you appease the board? Tell them I’ll make a statement about everything and clean this up but keep it vague until I iron out the details with Hudson. I’ve already had three missed calls from my mother I need to deal with. So, if you could do that, it would be a big help.”
A warm chuckle moved down the line. “Yes, I can do that for you. Once you’ve spoken to your mother and father, my wife is chomping at the bit to speak to you, so be prepared for the inquisition coming your way.”
Urgh, just what I need. My friends have been bugging me about Hudson and our history for months and now I’ll need to give them something. The thought makes my skin prickle. That pain is still raw around the edges, just ready to cut me if I let it.
“Okay, well, I might need a few hours so hold the fort.”
“Will do, cous.”
