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Brazen
“I love sleeping with you in my arms,” I tell Noah.
She sits on the couch, and I pull her feet into my lap. I hate the reminder that the first time we shared a bed for the night was when I was falling apart, but when I woke yesterday morning and realized Noah had slept in my arms, I couldn’t say I wasn’t extremely pleased. She stayed again last night, and I plan for her to stay again tonight.
“I love it, too, but I think you’re spoiling me. I’m not sure I’ll ever sleep soundly alone again.” Noah gives me a heart-stopping smile.
“When you want something, Noah, all you have to do is ask. Everything has moved quickly with us, and I have been a handful. So, the only reason you staying over didn’t happen sooner was because I didn’t want to push you.”
“It feels like I’m exactly where I belong and that we are moving at precisely the right speed.” She pulls a crinkled piece of paper from her pocket. “I have something I want to share with you.”
She playfully nudges my leg with her toe. My hand locks around her ankle.
“What do you have to share?” I sit up, ready for whatever it is.
“My list.”
That piece of paper in her hands means a lot to her. I knew that after the first time she spoke about it. In a time in her life where everything was unknown, it’s been like her road map. I’ve been more than curious to learn the contents.
“Your list? What list? I don’t remember ever hearing about any list.”
“You’re hilarious. Except you aren’t.” She sticks her tongue out at me like a child.
It’s cute.
“Oh, that list! I thought it was top-secret information that I’d never get to see.”
“Keep up with the funny business, and maybe I’ll change my mind.”
I pretend to lock my lips and throw away the key.
“That’s more like it.” Her smile is beaming.
“Of the things I’ve completed, I’ve done most of them with you. I figured it was time I let you in on my secrets.”
“I’m honored.”
I pull Noah by her legs so that she’s closer and resting under my arm. She flattens the list against her knees and tilts the page at me.
“Let’s see what we have here.”
The list is long and mostly filled with everyday things. A pang of melancholy squeezes my heart to really understand how much she missed out on as a kid, the most basic of joys that most of us take for granted. These are her dreams, at least for the near future, written in black and white on a tattered piece of paper.
Her list is sectioned off into four categories: Adventure, Artistic, Wild, Personal. Each list has at least one thing checked off.
Kiss a man I loveis checked off, and I beam with pride.
Paint a nude model and pose as one, and Get a tattoo are also checked off.
Fly on an airplaneis the one I wasn’t there for, but I can guess it was when she came to Florida.
My fingers trace over her shirt where I know the quirky Harry Potter quote is written on her skin. I’m happy I didn’t miss that one.
Make a friendis also done, and it hurts a little to know that was on her list. She came here with nothing and no one.
“Benson and Madison got lucky to get you as their friend.”
I have history with Madison, and I know a lot more about her because she was close with Sunday, but I need to get to know Benson better because he’s part of Noah’s life, too. My interactions with him so far have mostly only been polite greetings.
